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    • Shark

      Donations and Recognition!   12/22/2016

      Hello everyone! We are becoming a huge community and that doesn't come cheap. All staff here are volunteers and do this because they love the site. Right now, everything is paid out of pocket, by Erroneous. We would love for you to donate in order to help out with the site costs (i.e. Forum License, Domain Name, Hosting) so that we can keep Security and Forum Software up to date and possibly add some new features. If you do decide to donate, we have some fun, snazzy gifts of appreciation for you ;) Please message me (Shark) so we can get you the gifts of appreciation! We thank you for your support! Please use this link for more info   _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ How To Donate Scroll to the bottom of the screen and click the donate button.
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      NOTABLE DONORS LIST Here is where we honor the donors who go above and beyond the call of Aincrad! Top Tier Donors! Percival Row  Teayre Nezumi Benjamin Bookworm Zandra Alice Arc Atzo Baldur Claim Corvo Dominion Genji Ignavus_veneficus Jomei Kaya Kimi Lee Lessa Mack Macradon Nocturn Persephone Piera Ruus Sarial Hawke Shi Unyeilding Vale To express our gratitude, here is a picture of the iconic duo for all you wonderful supporters!
    • Shark

      The SAO Staff Team!   02/21/2017

      Hello members of SAO-RPG!

      I'm sure most of you (if not some) have noticed or heard changes were made to the staff team. If you are applying to staff, you may have noticed that the application process has recently changed. This has all happened because of a reformation of the staff team and the way it operates. The staff now has separate teams for development. These teams are: Floor Creation Team [Floors, Quests/Events, Bosses], Systems & Clarifications Team, and Player Support Team.

      "Who is on these teams?" Well the answer to that lies below! Floor Team Systems & Clarifications Team Player Support Team
      Minecraft Development Team
      * - Denotes Team Lead

      We also have a team to work on and develop the current systems but that team will search for its members and is not allowed to be applied to.

      Now you may be asking, "Shark, how does one apply to the Staff Team?" And I have but 1 simple answer!
      Go read this thread and it may answer all your questions!

      If you have any more questions, send me a PM and I will answer your questions about staff. (Only the format of teams and/or the application process)
    • Itzal

      Community Aid   04/17/2018

      Hello players of Aincrad! I created two threads in the support ticket section with the interest in having the community involved in the development of Aincrad in floor development, and even systems through your thoughts, concerns, and other forms of communication.  There are two separate threads for players to look at and share their opinions.  One is specifically for floors which is mainly helping by sharing ideas on what we could add/change/improve as far as our current floors go.  Come up with your own floors and share them with us for the chance of seeing that floor one day.  Or coming up with a quest and sharing it with us!  The other is specifically for systems, which is things like the rules, skill and level system, dungeon and combat systems, etc. I'm hoping people will be willing to share their opinion and thoughts for the purpose of helping to further this site further.
      Can't wait to see what you have in mind! Floor Development Suggestion Thread http://www.sao-rpg.com/topic/16352-a-helping-hand/
        Systems Development Suggestion Thread http://www.sao-rpg.com/topic/16347-a-helping-hand/  
Thorsten

[F12-PP] The Lake and The Forest (Eatos, Thorsten)

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Silver found himself in Lazaro. He was observing the fish in the river water and reminisced on how advantageous it was for him to fish and calm his mind doing so in the realm in which he came from. He wondered how Kathrine was holding up and remembered the times that she would find him on the lakeside when she needed help. Silver sent her a message.
“My dearest Kathrine,
I find myself today on the twelfth floor of the Castle Aincrad. I have observed this place to have some striking resemblances to the woods near our hometown. It would be fantastically wondrous for you to join me here. Perhaps we can talk about the times long passed or begin to create new journeys in the present. You may find me on the shore of the river, 500 meters south of the transport.
Best wishes,
Silver”

With that, he made his way to the location and sat down, happily awaiting the arrival of his friend.

@Eatos
 

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Down on the 4th floor, Eatos, or Katherine for those who knew the girls real name, was lying in bed with a large Husky lying next to her. It was how she'd slept for years, cuddling something. At first, it was a pillow, then it becomes a mixture of Husky and Human, depending on the day. She found it comforting, to feel the warmth and breathing of any life next to her. After her incident, it become worse and for nearly a year, she'd refused to sleep on her own out of fear. 

As the girl sat up, the large Husky whining about her moving, she was certain that those days were behind her...mostly. What she did could never be forgotten, nor forgiven, but, she had accepted that they had happened and she had to move on with her life. It was then Silvers' message arrived, and she smiled. Silver. She sent a quick reply. 

'Heya Silver. I'll be right up there!' 

She quickly got herself changed, and hesitated. Messages like the one she just sent felt, well, lazy. Silver put so much effort into speaking, making what he said so formal. At first when she met him, she swore he was trying to mock her just like everyone else. It had taken her some time to trust him, but now, she didn't hesitate hearing him speak. She whislted to Angel, who barked and followed her up to the 12th floor. Ever since the dog had changed into a Protector Familiar, it had been most demanding to be at her side at all times, not that she was complaining. 

She quickly found Silver, calling out and jogging up to him, the big Husky at her side loyally "Sorry it took me so long, i was...w-well, in bed when you sent the message..."

@Thorsten

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Silver did not find himself at the edge of the river long before his friend approached. Silver looked hag her with a warm smile, he was sitting with knee up and the other leg so that the foot pointed at the first. “Greetings, how hath the day faired thee?” He chuckled at her mention of having been in bed. “That is not uncommon for you, it’s good to know you haven’t lost yourself. No need to be apologetic, I have no problem waiting for you." With the last sentence Silver gave Katherine a wink, closong his blue eye, before he looked back at the water, waiting for her to sit down beside him. There was a large amount of nostalgia in this place, and he intended to take it in stride. 
Silver thought back to all the places he had been, his dad oft traveled with his work and Silver would tag along. Moving from one town to another, even from country to country from time to time. Silver hadn't been in the location where he met Katherine long before he actually met her. After they became friends he made a deal with his father to allow Silver to stay in that town whilst his father continued on with business.  Katherine had never met Silvers father, Silver had always made an excuse for his father’s absence when she came over. 

@Eatos

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At least Silver knew her, her and her bed, were often one and the same. She'd spent days in bed sometimes, after the incident was the worst. Days she refused to leave the bed no matter what, had been the darkest shadow on her life. But, it wasn't a part she had to hide from him. He'd been there each step of the way. 

"I'm ok" She said sitting down with him, Angel moving to Silver and demanding pets by moving his big body under the boys arm. She looked around, he was right, this place. Was just like back home. She found herself smiling before she was aware of it, just staring out onto the woods. This place was, something else. She missed it, in a way. It was yet another reminder of home, a taste of what he been stolen away from her. She looked over at Silver, and that smile continued as she leaned into him, against his side. It was comforting to be there, near him, leaning against him. It wasn't romantic, at least, not in her eyes, it was comforting to know he cared enough about her to deal with her need for affection. 

"I still. Can't believe you're here, that you got this game to try and surprise me and...now you're trapped in here with the threat of death looming over you...all because, you wanted to make me happy..." 

@Thorsten

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Angel had approached Silver, demanding attention. Silver provided happily. Petting the husky puppy as he did so. He wondered what would come of his inevitable search for a companion as this one was. Back in the real world, he had a pet owl that was expertly trained. It tended to sit on his shoulder wherever he was to go, watching and observing everything. Much like he did.
Silver turned to Eatos, smiling as she leaned against him. “What kind of protector would I be if I hadn’t been here? I feel that entering into this realm is the best thing that could have happened to me. Not only do I get the satisfaction of seeing you grow as a person. However, I get to experience things that few will be able to. The life and death associated with this world is not different from our own. In fact, they are one in the same. It is only your perception of such things that changes. What some see as fabrication in this realm, I see as reality. For what dictates reality if not the perception of each individual that experiences it?” Silver grabbed a handful of sand and let it fall slowly out of his hand.How is my grabbing at sand that looks, smells, and feels real, but is in this world, different from my doing the same in a different world?”
@Eatos

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Angel barked at Silver, snuggling up on his lap and sitting down comfortably. The large Husky (Angel is a doggo now, no longer pupper due to ) licked Silvers hand should it go close to his snout. 

She looked at Silver, tucked up under his arm, and listened. Mostly because that was their dynamic, she listened, he spoke. Or she ranted, but that wasn't very often she let herself go like that. Even if he saw it as the best thing, Katherine felt guilt within her. He could be living his life, yet here he was, still, looking after her. It was a nice comfort to have him around, but there was no lying that guilt filled her chest at it. A guilt that she was all too familiar with...

"But, even if that's so. This isn't the real world Silver...." Silver, and Stryder, both believed this. They both saw this game as the new world, the new reality. It was just so...different.

"This is a game, that we're trapped in here. Once we escape, we'll have to go back to the real world.Everything here will just...stop..."

@Thorsten

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Silver shrugged, “Perhaps, however, what is the difference between that and death? It comes for us all, ending existence abruptly. I see not a world that is different from our world, it is instead a world that coexists. I know I cannot change your mind on such thing, thus it is impractical for me to try.” He looked over the lake and into the shore behind it. “I wonder what life would be like should we not have purchased this game. I enjoy every aspect of it, that is not the reason I am curious, Instead I am curious as to the course of history that would have without a doubt taken place without us in the game. I wish I had the ability to access my journal so I could continue to write my stories and of the people I see. I wish to be able to calculate the scenarios I walk through from day to day using data and statistics I am familiar with. It is unfortunate that I no longer have that option. Though I am eager to relearn these things in this world.” 
Silver stood up and offered a hand to Eatos. “Come, I found an interesting cave nearby. Perhaps we can go explore it. I no doubt that you are filled with questions as to who I am, and who I was, after our encounter with the guild leader. I regret that situation completely, and now I must live with the consequences of my actions, and my words. I will tell you answers to your questions, I will be completely honest with you, though I will not be happy about it. I will tell you why I kept my life as secrete from you as I had. My only wish is that you do not see me in a different light as to how you had before you knew such things. My life is one that treads in things I regret, things I enjoy. The wisdom I pass on to others does not simply come from books and teachings, instead it comes from the things I have experienced, and the things that I have done. Though I have a question for you; have you happened to meet a Red Haired fellow with crimson eyes, the man a strong leader and a powerful manipulator?”
@Eatos

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Eatos didn't agree with Silver, but, well, this was far from the first time and she honesty doubted it was the last time. But they got along regardless, because they both kept an open mind. She smiled slightly as he pondered what would occur if they weren't in the game, and Eatos felt she knew. Nothing would change. She knew, as of this moment, she had done nothing of large impact. Maybe in the future, but of now, she was just like any other player, having achieved so little to help beat the game or save others. Perhaps that would change, but that was not what was occuring now and so, like Silver taught her, was pointless to worry about such things. 

She watched him stand, taking his hand as Angel barked, annoyed having his pillow moved. The girl did frown, but he wasn't wrong. The encounter with Stryder made her realize, well, how little she knew about Silver and where he came from. He always was vague with his answers when she did ask, and well, at the time, she was selfish and used him as a comfort caring only for herself. She frowned at the question, a red-haired player with crimson eyes? That description fitted two players, although she didn't know either that well and one of them was a female.

"Crimson eyes, red hair..." She was curious as to why he wanted to find them, but he would tell her, surely.. "Only two players comes to mind. The first is a girl though, her name is like Ember or something. She was very, well, emotional....The other, well, i've only met him a few times at his store on the first floor. I think his username is...Domaru? It's something like that. W-why are you looking for him?"

She was somewhat nervious, Silver never really talked about his past, and what was in there that would make her see him any different? He had seen her at her absolute lowest, why would she treat him any different.  She took a deep breath, but didn't begin to move towards the cave her friend her mentioned, instead waiting, for two reasons. The first was an answer, and the second....she had somewhat of a promise to make back, a promise that she had been making since Silver showed up in the game. 

@Thorsten

 

Edited by Eatos

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Silver listened to the names given and shook his head. “No, it is a man. Domaru wouldn’t be like him. The reason I ask is because the man I am looking for is of my bloodline.” Silver thought for a moment. “I have heard rumors of his being here, his birth name is Alexander Zevulum The Third, he is my nephew. His family name is Atzo, though I doubt that would be his screen name. The probability that a member of the family he has forsaken being here, would be too high. One like me, one that is unhappy with his treatment of other family members and his distain for the family law. While all I need to do is talk to him about his official abandonment of the bloodline. That way there are no loose ends. ” Silver shrugged seeing it as something to figure out at a later date. 
He looked at Eatos, smiling once again as he admired how far his friend had come. He then noticed her outstretched hand. She had been trying to stop him, it was never something Silver was used to though he wouldn’t go around it. “What is on your mind, mistress?” Silver knew that she had something she wished to express. It was only natural, he assumed, that she would have something she wished to say. Thus he would stand there and hear her out on whatever it was that troubled her.
@Eatos

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Atzo....That name, struck a deep cord within her that the look of shocked passed over. Of course she knew that name, he was...her old Guild Leader, and, well...Many things. Friend being one of them. Atzo, and Thorsten, were related? She took a breath and tried to compose herself, but, well, if he knew her as well as he did, he'd known the signs that something had been rattled within her, that name had hit home. 

'What are the chances they're the same person, my Atzo and this Alex. He never did tell me his real name, and he fits the description..' He hadn't thought about her guild leader much, had actively tried not to ever since he vanished for a second time. The first time, he had lost his mind, his sanity broken, and she had been working on bringing him back. Then he vanished again, and nothing. She had feared the worst, and wanted to stop thinking about it. How was she to reply? She had no idea, and opted, for now, to not. She didn't want to give her friend false hope, she'd go back to Atzo's home and find something, then she'd tell him. He'd suffered enough becasue of her, she wouldn't give him false hope.

At the question of what she wanted, she sighed and reached into her inventory, pulling out two items. One Curved Sword, and a Katana. She took a deep breath, ever since Silver had arrived in this game, she had to make a decision. And this was it. He knew her 'build' was that of a healer, a support player to protect others. No longer.

"Silver...I promise that, in this game, i'm going to protect you. I...i picked up these Sword Skills, the ability to use Curved blades and, soon, Katanas. You've spent to long looking after me....it's my turnShe looked her friend in the eyes, and he'd see it. A fire in her eyes, something that hadn't been there for some time. She had a reason to fight harder now, not just heal in the back, but fight on the front lines....Assuming she was brave enough. 

@Thorsten

 

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Silver saw the remembrance of the name Atzo as he spoke. It was clear she didn’t want to speak of it but, he knew that his nephew was here. That was a good start.
Silver's face lit up as he saw her pull out the curved blade. As he saw the fire ignite in her eyes. He reached out and ruffled her hair. “I’m so proud of you.” Silver said, a tear rolling down his face “When I found you, you were too scared to even talk to me, afraid of what I might think. But now…” Silver took a deep breath great trying to regain composure, “now you are so much more! You have made friends on your own that you trust, you have obtained a passion and a pet all on your own. You have secured yourself a co-leader position in a guild and you have come to the point that you are vowing to protect me, of all people. To protect your bloody advisor. I am constantly impressed by how far you have come and how marvelous a woman you are. You have become wide the stunning and intellectual woman, my mistress Katherine. How I wish I could have seen it, the ups and downs. How I wish I could have shared in your successes and failures. But now, seeing this… I am filled with such joy to see how far you have come. Perhaps, all you needed was for me to step back and let you flap your wings on your own.” Tears of joy streamed down Silvers face. Slowly he regained composure, “Shall we go to the cave?”
@Eatos

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Eatos wasn't sure how he'd react to learning she was planning on putting herself in danger, but she was happy he didn't seem to want to stop her. She'd never seen him get to emotional before, it was unusual. Normally, he was very good at keeping his emotions calm and surpressed in ways. To see him cry, was like a page of a book she'd never read before. But she was beaming at the compliments, him showering them on her like this. She was just happy that she had made him proud, and she was proud of herself. The decision wasn't an easy one to make for her, but, well, she had no choice and so it was done. 

"It was this game, it forced me to make a choice. I could stand at the back of fights and heal, and watch my friends fight. Or i could fight alongside the,. I'm not giving up my job at a healer, and i'm gunna ensure i can keep everyone from dying. But the ones of a weaker level, i can save them using this sword. I can ensure they stay alive by putting myself in the front" 

She nodded her head at his request of a cave, and followed after him. It wasn't easy, the choice to pick a weapon, but it had to be done. She would keep everyone alive, even if she had to put herself on the front line to do so. 

@Thorsten

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Silver nodded at her statement. “Follow your heart, Katherine. If your goal is to become someone to take on the frontlines head first, then by all means do so! I will be staying back, you know how I am. I plan to improve my skills at observation, gain the power of sneak, and perhaps I will achieve whatever is equivalent to my martial arts training. Do not hold yourself back.” They continued walking, the road lead them through what seemed to be a suburb. It was a pleasant little town. “I believe the curved blade you chose suits you well. I am not sure as to the reason you chose it but if I know you, and what I taught you, you have put a lot more thought into the choice then most would.” 
The duo came to a spot where the road turned away from the river, though Silver proceeded to forgo the road and follow the riverside. They were close. He looked around at the beauty of everything there was to see. “How interesting it is that we, as no more than man, have the power to create such magnificent worlds and psudopeople in them. Very few of those that some call NPC’s that I have run into have had what seemed to be a manufactured personality. It imposes the question of what is real and what is fake even more.” 
A short trip longer and the duo came to a small waterfall. Silver lead Eatos behind it and into the cave. It was small; however the sound of the waterfall did not overpower the silence of the cave. Silver sighed and sat against the wall. “Here we are, ask away and I shall answer.”
@Eatos

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Walking at his side again, it felt right in so many ways. It was what she missed so much when she came into this game, the constant reminder of the rock that kept her on the ground. The friend that kept her stable when the world was lost in chaos. Listening to him speak, she smiled, but didn't ocrrect him. She had no intention to be on the front lines, at least, not any time soon. Her level was low, her stats needed more of a tuneup and, with her knowledge of bosses, well, she was scared of them. Scared because they had the best chance to kill her. But, well, another thought for another time.

As they walked, her mind drifted...to Atzo. Alexandar Zevulum. Were they one and the same? If so, with him vanishing, was he...dead? She looked at Thorsten, and couldn't. She could tell him there was every chance his newphew was dead, killed at this own hands. A burden she had been silently carrying for some time, and one that was slowly consuming her. 

It was only once inside the cave, that Eatos looked straight into the eyes of her friend. She couldn't, keep it from him. But, she had to know...

"This, Alexandar...what was he like?"

She was hoping, against all hope, that Atzo was not Alexandar. Because, she wasn't sure she had it in her to look her friend in the eyes, and tell him what she thought has occured. 

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Silver was caught slightly off guard by the focus on his nephew, he frowned but a promise was a promise. “Alexander, or Atzo as I shall refer to him from here on out, is to myself and the family a lost cause. After his killing of my brother and my brother’s wife, he fled. He decided that the best course of action for himself was to leave the family behind. Now, don’t take me the wrong way, I have no reason to quarrel with Atzo over any such thing. Nor do I hold distaste for his murder of my brother. Do I believe that he poorly executed the occurrence? Yes. Am I upset with his sudden disconnect from the family? Yes, but he wouldn’t be the first. Am I mad that he killed my brother? No, not only was the man far inferior to the abilities of the family but he acted as a pawn more than a king. Thus he was only kept around to do the work of a pawn. Not to mention that in the line of work the family deals in… let’s just say that death is an accepted occupational hazard.” He paused to think. “If, of course, you are asking me of his personality it is a follows. He is a stubborn man who believes that his emotions can be locked away and forgotten about without any consequences to his mental state. He constantly breaks his ability to be impartial and unemotional as he goes about his daily life, giving into his anger and his rage. Based on his past, I would not be surprised to hear that he had a group of close companions that he could call friends. Possibly even ran a guild. But something got to him and interrupted his born abilities as a Zevulum to hide things away. If this were the case then it would be logical for him to go on long, unexpected, absences from those he found close to him. As he was to scared of what his mind held to properly deal with the things around him.”

@Eatos

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There was no doubt in the mind of Katherine. Atzo, and Alex, were the same person dammit! She swore silently, it was too much to hope they were different people, so much to hope that now, she carried the knowledge. That Alex was, more than likely, dead. Killed at the hands of his own insanity, the crippling loneliness that ate at him each and every day. It sounded like a massive family blood feud, and this was the first she was hearing of it. She had never really asked about Silvers family before, never really thought about it. At the times, well, she had her own battle to fight. So all of this, well, she was slightly taken aback by it all. 

It was a burden, while normally keeping secrets was easy, this was one she wouldn't carry alone.

"I met him, he went by the screen name Atzo. We, well...I was helping him, like how you helped me. He was in a bad place, and...He vanished" She didn't look at him, couldn't. Out of shame, she'd failed Atzo. It was her fault he was gone again. She wasn't good enough! "I, last time he vanished...I found him just in time to stop him walking into lava....He vanished months ago now..."

@Thorsten

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Silver nodded as Kathrine spoke about Atzo. He thought about how to speak to her about his nephew’s disappearance. “First of all, you have no need to worry about Atzo. While he I do not like the man, I must give him respect. He can fend for himself, he did it for many years. We all did. He is smart enough not to get himself killed. Secondly, it is not surprising that he vanished. As I said, it is how he operates best. He uses hit and run tactics in his day to day life, not realizing that it gets him nowhere and hurts those he cares about. Do not dwell on him, he will find his way, and perhaps that way will allow him to come out on top. Though, based on experience, it more than likely won’t.” He thought for a moment and looked to the wall of the cave, close to the opening. It was damp, and some small drops of water could be seen running down the side. “Much like the water falls. Zevulums are taught from a young age to complete their task and leave. Those in power fear the name if they do not believe we are on their side. Our lives are shaped to be what we are from the beginning. He was no different from me in how he was raised, save his idiot of a father. The main difference is that he chose to be the way he is today. Much like how I chose to be the man I am. He knows how to be happy, how to be content with life much like I am. He chooses to run from it.” He sighs and looks back to Kathrine, looking her directly in the eye. “Remember this, when dealing with Atzo. You cannot fix anyone, You cannot change someone who does not want to be changed. At the most, all you can do is offer your advice and knowledge to assist in their change or fixing of themselves. That is not something for you to be concerned with yourself, that is not something you can hold against yourself. You do not have the ability to fix Atzo if he will not let you fix him. That is his fault, not yours.”

@Eatos

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The issue was, despite his words. Eatos did worry about him, did dwell on him, and took the blame. She could have saved him, could have fixed him! It was on her, and she'd failed. Even as her friend looked her in the eye, he'd see that she blamed herself. An all-too familiar scene playing out before him once again. 

"I could have saved him Silver, i could have helped him. I was helping him, i was making him a better person. I was getting through to him...." She slumped on the ground, hiding her face in her arms "I just thought....If i could help someone, anyone, just one person, it would be worth it. My living. But i couldn't even fix one lost child.." 

She exited her arms, looking up at him. She felt vulnerable, weak. She hated it, and part of her wanted to run away. She loathed this feeling, hated feeling weak. Yet, it was all she felt talking about Atzo, and believing it was all her fault he was possible dead. 

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Silver sighed and shook his head. “I do not want to push this, I understand that I cannot change your mind about this. Go, Katherine, save him. Though, I must say I will refrain from advice on the matter. I have a lot of respect for you, I have a vast amount of admiration for you. So go, prove me wrong  if you must. However, if you find yourself in a position of regret because of this, I will have little I can do to help you remove such regret.” Silver looked her in the eyes, “you live your life by your own choices, if this is what you so choose to do then very well. However, remember this, every choice you make, you make for those who care about you as well. Everything you say or do affects everyone who is close to you.” 
It was hard for Silver to back down from this, and he made no effort to hide his anguish. Though, he was certain that there wasn’t anything more should do from here. He knew how Atzo worked, he had seen his fall. Similarly he knew Katherine well. He had participated in her rise. The part that tolled on him was his inability in this moment to ensure her mental safety. He remembered to the day his grandfather told him the most important advice he had heard. “Wind,” his grandfather had said “in my experience, throughout the ages, of lives I have impacted and assisted, I learned one thing that has never failed to be true. No matter what you do, how charismatic you are or how close you are to someone, regardless as to the amount of mutual love you share. If someone has their heart set on something, you will never be able to change their mind. Not even if you know the consequences.”

@Eatos

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Save him. It took so much will power to not cry. So much more than she expected, she had to hold her own hand to keep herself from shaking. Atzo was dead! She couldn't' save him, because she'd failed him and he was already dead. Years ago, Silver had saved her from herself, and maybe, just maybe, if she could do that for someone else, her life would be worth it. But no, she couldn't even do that. She couldn't save Alexander, and because of her failure, he'd ended his own life. 

"I can't save him...." She muttered quickly, trying to push back all the emotions that starting punching at her "Unlike you, i was too late. I couldn't save Atzo, i couldn't save anyone from...from him..." 'Him', was an all-too-familiar face "I thought everything was ok, that i was stronger than i was before. That's why i took up a sword skill. But i'm not, i'm just as useless as when you first met me" Her thoughts had ganged up on her, a negative mindset that impacted Katherine her entire life. Once she started down a dark thought, the deeper she went, the harder and harder it was to bring herself back to normal. A spiral of self-loathing that fed itself. 

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