[PP-F01] (Black, Mutsu) In Sickness and in Health <<Secret Medicine of the Forest>>

[Black 0]

“You cocky little…” Black retorted as he danced about the battlefield, staring down his opponent. The woman had a comeback for everything. It was great. “It's starting to fill a lot like Christmas!” Black said mockingly as she jingled again. “And here's your present!” He shouted at the Nepent while bearing his sharp fangs.

He tightened his grip upon his blade and made sure he ripped through his enemy. It knocked off a tiny increment of health. Black was only able to do so much, but relied on his armor to do the finishing blow. However, it seemed this Neoent Variant was short a few chromosomes as Black stood perfectly still and yet the poor thing missed. “You missed! How could you miss! I was three feet in front of you!” Black shouts out, referencing the little dragon from Mulan.

He then pauses and blinks at Mutsu after she calls him the crayon eating muscle and suddenly a lightbulb goes off in his head as he points a finger to the sky and begins to speak like the Chef Ignus from Final Fantasy XV “That's it! I've learned a new recipe!” And then he began to write in his journal. “Crayon eating muscles….DMG buff...yes, yes…” Once he was done, he shot a thumbs up to Mutsu.

@Mutsu

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 107996
BD: 7 (Hit) [3+3 ACC Clothing+1 ACC Food]

Boss Nepent - 5/15 (-1 DMG)

Mutsu: 17/20 (0/2 EN) (Hate: 2)
Black: 259/260 (Hate: 3)

"I don't care how much it feels like Christmas," Mutsu retorted, flinging out her sarissa out at the boss nepent and, again, inflicting negligible damage to the creature. "You'll not be unwrapping my presents," she declared, dropping her weapon and placing her hands protectively over her armored chest. "They're shy." Then came the reference to Mulan and Mutsu squinted her chocolate brown eyes in @Black's direction, trying to see if he had any tattoos on his arms. As luck would have it, he did.

"Will those tattoos protect you from harm," she asked sweetly, delivering an open palmed smack to the back of Black's head. Since she had no ranks in martial arts it inflicted no damage to him, thus not adding any further penalty to her orange cursor. "If so, I'd get my money back if I were you." She grinned impishly at Black and danced back over to where she had dropped her weapon, retrieving it in a single graceful, fluid, and jingling motion.

"You Jarheads really do eat crayons, don't you," she asked. "Which color tastes best? Is it red? I bet it's red."

Edited October 22, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

Black bobbed and weaved around the Nepent's attacks. Not because he needed to, but more because it was just good casual fun. The way it whipped at his feet, he just couldn't afford it messing up his new kicks.

Mutsu came spouting out nonsense as usual after she gave the Nepent a sharp pounding. Black then heard her talking about not unwrapping presents, then acting like some kawaii girl after. Black blushed...or maybe he didn't. It was sort of hard to tell with his skintone, but it was obvious his imagination was running wild. So much so that he didn't even think to attack his enemy. Perhaps this is why the Marines never got to have nice things...like ladies serving alongside them in the Infantry.

“Gah!” He snapped back to reality to Mutsu giving him a smacking. “Oh, no...actually they were suppose to attract the physical affection of beautiful girls...but...maybe too much emphasis on the physical part and not so much affection.” He chuckled rubbing his head.

He then tilted his head at her and blinked as he withdrew a purple crayon from his pocket. “I don’t know...maybe for other Marines...but Dark Green Marines tend to go for grape for….obvious reasons.” He says as he bites off a chunk of the crayon. “ Want some?” He says as he pulls out a fresh red one. “It's a candy snack...no seriously. I made it for s**ts and giggles..”

@Mutsu

 

Spoiler

BD-4 Miss MD-5 Miss

Boss Nepent - 5/15 (-1 DMG)

Mutsu: 17/20 (0/2 E N) (Hate: 2)
Black: 259/260 (Hate: 3)

 

 

Edited October 22, 2018 by Black

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 108039
BD: 8 (Hit) [4+3 ACC Clothing+1 ACC Food]

Boss Nepent - 4/15 (-1 DMG)

Mutsu: 17/20 (0/2 EN) (Hate: 3)
Black: 259/260 (Hate: 3)

"I thought this was a combat fantasy role playing game, not Dance Dance Revolution," Mutsu remarked dryly, watching as @Black danced this way and that while he was fighting the Boss Nepent. "You know, it's a lot easier to hit the target if you don't have happy feet. Even if penguins are adorable," Mutsu continued, ramming the business end of her spear into the Nepent for another solid, if not very damaging hit. She was quite pleased with herself for having referenced yet another movie. A movie with dancing penguins, no less. Take that, Marine.

"If that's your mating dance, it leaves a lot to be desired," she continued, chatting away happily as Black continued to dodge the Nepent's attacks. "And I don't know why you're complaining. Any attention from a woman such as myself should make your day. I mean really, I am delightful and wildly attractive. Once I deal with my self confidence issues," Mutsu said, in mock seriousness, "I will really go places, you know."

"Oh my God, it's true. Marines really do eat crayons," she said when the snack was offered. There was no way she was eating that. Not in a million years. "Oh no, I really couldn't deprive you of so tasty a treat."

Edited October 23, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

“Really? I mean all this time I've been trying to defend my world title in dancing from you and your jingling all over the place. “ Black retorted with a response as dry as sandpaper. “Can't go letting the little newbies beat my high score.” Black then shuffles about the battlefield evading blows left and right. “Oh! Happy feet! That was my movie. Don't they have some weird mating ritual.” Black replies with an evil grin as he flicks a pebble in her direction. “There. Now you have a token of my appreciation. Perhaps it will satisfy those weird cravings. “

Black stands proud as the nepent whips a tentacle at him and he just tilts his head to the side to evade. “Yeah...real shame...I know your pain..being wildly attractive and attracting every wild beast out in the forest. But then again...you came here on purpose, but yeah..I'm not judging or anything.”

Black huffed. “Damn, and here I thought you had potential. “ The man shakes his head and crunches on a crayon. “You just lost about five points. How are we supposed to be battle buddies if you ain't willing to chow down on some crayons with me? This is treason.”

@Mutsu

Spoiler

108043  

BD-2 MD - 1 

 

Edited October 23, 2018 by Black

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 108093
BD: 1 (Hit) [1+3 ACC Clothing+1 ACC Food]

Boss Nepent - 4/15

Mutsu: 17/20 (0/2 EN) (Hate: 3)
Black: 259/260 (Hate: 3)

"Excuse me," Mutsu asked, blinking her big chocolate colored eyes at @Black and completely forgetting that she was in combat with a monster."Your world title? No, I am the champion dancer! When I dance it's sexy, happy, jingly, and fun. When you dance it looks like a hippo trying to dodge incoming mortar fire while filling a plate at the buffet table," the brunette declared primly. Then she flounced in a circle around Black, jingling merrily the entire time until he flicked a pebble at her.

"Pebble," the spearwoman declared, sniffing haughtily. "You'd have better luck with a diamond. It don't mean a thing if it ain't got the bling. Everyone knows that. And I'm not eating crayons because I don't need to clog up my system or poop out a rainbow. Now then, you be a useful Marine," she swatted Black entirely harder than was necessary on his rump, "and go kill that leafy monster thing for me." Mutsu shook her shoulders back and forth and looked up at Black with a pouty duck face. "Please..."

Edited October 24, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

The sassy chocolate eyed vixen was throwing jabs left and right with the Marine and he enjoyed the banter. “Hmmm...you're just jealous I get to eat like a hippo at the buffet because all my fans shower me with cash...and that mortar fire...that's just my fireworks celebrating my claim to fame!” He said as he began to get dizzy from watching her dance around him.

She then made some fancy comment about getting a diamond. “Hmm...you know...I could do that...or I could just wear this fancy shirt!” Black said as he pulled out a lucky shirt that was ebony and had a graphic of a samurai against the setting of a red sun. “It's a lucky shirt...so...you know...I say my chances just improved about 15%. See? Right here in the guidebook.” Black stats as he smacks the side of his trusty dusty guide book. “Lowkey, though...word on the street is people do that marriage bullshit in the game for extra stats. Perfect for the bromance duos. “ He blinks at Mutsu. “Seriously though. I've seen more guys marry each other just for the hell of it. They just out here killing mother****ers with the power of love!” Black exclaims as he throws his hands in the air. Unfortunately, that's what caused the nepent to miss him.

“Well, [censored]...we might as well start pitching tents.” He then just realized what he just said. “Uh...on second thought...you better not. If you do, I might need my pebble back.” Black casts her a [censored]-eating grin from his crude remark.

@Mutsu

 

Spoiler

 

Post action: Equip +3 LD basic shirt

ID# 108094 results:

MOB: 5 (Miss)

ID: 10 8093
BD: 1 (Hit) [1+3 ACC Clothing+1 ACC Food]

Boss Nepent - 4/15

Mutsu: 17/20 (0/2 EN) (Hate: 3)
Black: 259/260 (Hate: 3 )

 

 

Edited October 24, 2018 by Black

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 108093
BD: 10 (Hit) [6+3 ACC Clothing+1 ACC Food]

Boss Nepent - 3/15 (-1 DMG)

Mutsu: 17/20 (0/2 EN) (Hate: 4)
Black: 259/260 (Hate: 3)

Mutsu watched as @Black changed his armor out and did not even bother trying to make an attack. Honestly, it was like the Marine didn't even care that they were supposed to be killing a giant creepy Weepinbell for the second time in less than an hour. She blew out a sigh between her lips and scowled at the other player for a moment before abruptly perking up at a brilliant new idea that had just occurred to her.

Why hadn't she thought to try this before? It seemed so obvious now how to increase her attack power. She needed a mount. That was the way things worked in Dungeons and Dragons, mounted Knights always got a combat advantage.

Everyone knew that.

Circling behind Black while he changed out his gear, the spearwoman took several lunging steps that were each punctuated by a jingle that sounded somehow sinister. Then she leapt into the sky, but not very high because plate armor, she slammed into Black's back, wrapped her legs around his waist, her free left arm around his shoulders, and lowered her ludicrously lengthy sarissa just like a Knight's lance over Black's right shoulder.

"Tally ho, Battle Hippo! IT WORKS IN WORLD OF WARCRAFT!" Mutsu shouted, practically in Black's ear. Her weapon flashed out, drove home into the Boss Nepent, and still did basically no damage.

"Only one point of damage," she asked, confused, still clinging to the battle hippo. "But how? The physics seemed so right..." She completely ignored the remark about tents, the American turn of phrase going over her head. She had no intention of sharing any kind of dwelling with Black. "Combat Battle Hippos sleep in the stables, not in tents," she said finally, having worked out a proper response. "Now, hyaaaaaaahh BATTLE HIPPO! CHARGE!"

Edited October 24, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

Black seemed to be relaxing in a carefree moment as he indulged himself in a book, taking the time to eat one of his delicious Lucky Sushi Rolls that gave him a +2 LD buff. He felt that he needed to be as prepared as possible for the grand duel with the RNG Gods. “And now we sit and wait…” He mused as he began to add a bit of wasabi to his taaty little snack and devour it.

He was completely oblivious to Mutsu's mischievous schemes. “Ha, this manga is great. Hey, Mutsu, you should re- Hey! What the hell are you?!” Black gasped and looked back at her, but the easygoing man loved his wild antics and neither like a mad man as he charged at the opponent and they tackled each other. “Mess with the bull and you get the thorns!” Black smirked as a medicinal item fell from the beast.

He then turned his head up at Mutsu. “You done having fun? I mean if you were going to ride me, I thought you'd  pick a better saddle.” Black smirked as he began to rummage through his pockets and activate a song crystal. The song featured was “Pony” by Ginuwine.

“I'm just a bachelor, I'm looking for a partner.~”
“Someone who knows how to ride, without even falling off.~”

He would then snicker a little and give her a buck to get her off.

"So, want to go gather up some materials and talk about anime and [censored] for a bit before we turn in the quest? You ever seen Seven Deadly Sins?" He asked as he'd turn around, no matter if she was still on or not.

 

@Mutsu

 

 

Spoiler

Post Action: Eat Lucky Sushi Roll

 ID# 108152 results:

MOB: 6

 

 ID# 108153 results:

Loot: 7 (+3) (+2) = 12

 

 

Edited October 25, 2018 by Black

[Mutsu 0]

OOC: We can roll for another Treasure Chest in 10 Posts. We can roll for one after every PAGE of posts.

ID: 108160
LD: 7 (Nothing)

"Different saddle, Battle Hippo," Mutsu asked, blinking at @Black as she slid off of his back. "What are you talking about, Hippo? It would be much more difficult to be a good lancer riding side saddle," the brunette continued, nodding sagely. "And front saddle, well Battle Hippo, now you're just being silly. Everyone knows you ride on the Battle Hippo's back,' Mutsu said, jingling around in front of Black and then flicking him on the nose. "Everyone knows." She looked pensive for a moment.

"Of course, maybe you meant you don't want to be a Hippo. Well, there is that Bon Jovi song about cowboys," Mutsu said, bouncing away to where the item had dropped and singing, "I'm a cowboy! On a steel horse I ride! I'm wanted, dead or alive!" She scooped up the Quest item and added it to her inventory. "So, maybe you could be a Battle Buick."

"What's that," she demanded, pointing into the woods. The brunette went darting in, chasing a glint of gold that she thought she had seen. But, when she reached the spot there was nothing there. "False alarm, thought I saw a treasure chest. Turns out it was only my chest which is a treasure, but not one you can behold... it would probably stop your heart and then I'd have a permanent orange marker."

Edited October 25, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

“Why a battle hippo?” Black giggled in response to such a proposterous animal being taken into battle. “Actually...nawl, that's a pretty good choice. I saw how powerful those teeth are. I also saw a YouTube video of one getting crazy pissed at this SUV and chomping the whole hood off. It was crazy. “

He then considers her question. “Wait a second...side saddle is a thing? So what are you just hanging off at that point?” He laughed picturing someone hanging off the side of a mount for dear life.

She flicks him on the nose to which he stares at his nose in a cross eyed fashion. “I mean..as if you were having trouble giving me a nosebleed. That's cheating…”

“Ohhh, cowboy stuff is fun. Especially the outlaw stuff. Like the old school red redemption games! Loved that stuff!” Black then taps his chin. “Oh! Or Fallout series...I guess this world is like a medieval fallout, I suppose.”

He then looks as she searches for treasure. “Ha, greedy goblin. If you wanted to search for treasure, I could have helped. They call me the Lucky Devil for a reason, you know! I stay ready with lucky gear and food!” He flashes a smile. “And yes, please don't PK me...although, it would be an honorable death for a Marine. “ He then blinks. “I wonder if you get a purple heart for that…”

@Mutsu

[Mutsu 0]

"Hippo," Mutsu asked, popping back out of the little copse of trees where she had disappeared to search for the loot she thought she had seen. "Because you eat like one at the buffet table," she continued in a sweet tone, blinking her large brown eyes at @Black. "Your words, not mine."

"And I don't know what's up with the whole side saddle thing," Mutsu said in response to the side saddle comment. "They say it's more proper for a lady" Mutsu said, scowling and making air quotes with het fingers, then she blew a raspberry. "Forget that, it's a lot easier to stab things from a proper mount and this is the Twenty-first century..." Mutsu traded off, looking cross, then she threw her head back and shouted.

"ASIAN WOMEN CAN BE KNIGHTS! ASIAN WOMEN CAN BE KNIGHTS! ASIAN WOMEN CAN BE KNIGHTS!"

Once she had calmed down she looked at Black suggestively and winked. "If I kill you, you will be smothered, we'll leave it at that."

[Black 0]

“I mean...I like to think I'm more of a lion or a dragon...maybe even like a badass wolf. Something with fangs and claws. They eat a lot too. Now, if we're going to relate me to a fatbody like a hippo. Wrong branch. May want to look up the chair force. Or...since Hippos love the water...maybe check with your little Navy buddies.”

Black laughs lightly, then gets a different image in his mind at the idea of side saddle concepts. “Ohhh, that old fancy weird [censored] where you look like you want to hop off at any moment. Stick to stabbing how you used to...familiars in this game are small enough. I think you'd be the only one able to ride them...if ugh..you didn't have so much weighing you down.” Black grinned sheepishly.

“Of course, of course. “ Black said in response to Mutsu. “ And Black men can be samurai. “

Black pouts at her last response about smothering him. “Somehow I don't think that involves the right set of pillows I was hoping for” as he goes to gather more materials.

Spoiler

ID# 108197 results:

Loot: 10 (+5)

1 T1 Mat gathered

@Mutsu

Edited October 26, 2018 by Black

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 108254
LD: 13 (Nothing)

"You take that back," Mutsu demanded, then she walloped @Black up the side of his head with the haft of her sarissa, not caring if it tacked on extra time to how long she would be cursed with an orange cursor. "Navy are not hippos. We're sharks. Or killer whales. Personally, I like to think of myself as an adorably cute sea otter, because I am adorable," Mutsu continued, winding up for a rant as she rocked back and forth and gave Black the most adorable look in the history of ever while she jingled softly. "Besides, hippos are at home in the water or on land while lions, dragons, and wolves are not. Ergo, you are a battle hippo. And you admitted you eat like one," Mutsu concluded, holding a finger up and then flicking Black in the nose again. She spoke with the finality of someone who had just, in their own mind, won the argument so inarguable a manner that further arguing would be pointless.

She continued to carry on for a bit, smacking the biggest tree in the clearing several times with her weapon, but nothing happened from that impromptu search for mats.

Edited October 28, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

Vengeance was hers as the pipsqueak pummeled him to a pulp. She had no concern for his well being or safety. "You know...I read about these abusive relationships in a pamphlet once...this keeps up and I'm gonna have to call a GM." Black chuckled lightly. "And what's with your dude anyway? Isn't Kayaba from Japan? I thought you guys were known for being smart. Kidnapping and killing off thousands of people from all the different nations...that's..given him more red flags than ISIS. I just hope Japan's police department know what they are doing. They piss this guy off and he'll pull the plug on our a**es. "
 

Black then began to munch on a delicious rice cake. "Hippo...hmmm...if we're talking water creatures...I'm a big ass megalodon. That's like a super shark. Definitely a megalodon or maybe a kickass dolphin. Ohhhh, you ever watch that documentary about how corrupt seaworld was with those animals that kept eating their staff? " He'd exclaim as he spoke in an excited manner.

@Mutsu

 

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 108395
LD: 13 (Nothing)

"It's not abuse if you like and encourage it, sweetie," Mutsu replied, giggling. "Everyone knows that." While she was responding to @Black she had disappeared a short way into the surrounding forest once again. What she was doing in the trees was anyone's guess. She could be heard thumping on various things in there with her weapon as she jingled from place to place, so it seemed pretty obvious that she was searching for something as she moved around in there. A few moments later the brunette jingled back out into the clearing, looking a bit disgruntled since she had clearly failed to locate anything in the trees.

"Dolphins are not kickass and Megalodon's are extinct," she huffed, glaring at Black as he munched away on his rice cake. Seriously, it was as if he had an unending supply of things to eat. It also seemed as if he was always eating. "You are a battle hippo," she said after a moment's thought, adopting the same tone of voice that one might use when they were talking to an infant or an animal. "Yes you are! Who's a good battle hippo? Who's the good battle hippo eating the rice cake? You are!"

Edited November 2, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

“That's just sick. I see how it is. This is like a carnival game to you and you're trying to whack me to get the most points. You thinking Kayaba will give you a high score on the leaderboards or some special achievement?” He chuckled as he casually walked through the forest, trying to study the different array of items he could pluck to use as ingredients in a tasty dish.

The loud pounding in the forest made Black wonder what was going on. He looked perplexed as he didn't know any mob in the area to make a noise quite like that. Hopefully there wasn't some secret encounter he didn't know about. However the jingling of bells would offer some semblance of relief as she came back to refute his claim of the awesomeness of animals and ridicule those long dead.

“Well, if that's how you’re gonna be. I guess that calls for more comfort food!” He grins widely. “Hmm...I wonder if there are mechanics in the game that will make you fat if you eat too much.” He stated as he pulled out some teriyaki chicken. “Well, only one way to find out!" As he began to munch on his food, he swallowed and gave Mutsu a goofy grin. "Hey..battle hippos have to eat a lot...you know..burning energy in all the battles..it really wears us out!"

@Mutsu

[Mutsu 0]

ID: 108455
LD: 14 (Nothing)

"Everything is one big game to me," Mutsu said, brandishing her sarissa at @Black in a threatening manner, making it clear that she was thinking about walloping him over the head yet again. "Of course, if it is a game then I need to get the high score, right," she asked as the chef produced yet another snack, seemingly from nowhere, and began to eat it. Right in front of her. Without offering to share.

Rude.

Obviously he was holding out.

The provider of extravagant gifts of deliciousness.

Taking a few quick steps towards Black, Mutsu tossed her spear to one side and then tried to tackle the much larger Marine with her much smaller frame. When she slammed into him, her quick little fingers began to dart into his pockets, looking for something she could eat. "Stop holding out on me! I know you got snacks!"

Edited November 3, 2018 by Mutsu

[Black 0]

"Everything is just one big game? Sounds like maybe you'd make a perfect campaign for VRMMO's. Life is just one big game! " Black declared with excitement. "Though, you know...Kayaba has [censored] game design. He could have at least gave us three lives. The b******d.." Black grumbled as he kept chewing on his comfort food. "I'd actually complain more but hey good tasting food everyday is usually pretty expensive..and hell Col is easier to get than grocery money. I think if that system wasn't around, I'd be mad as hell." Black states with furrowed brows and cheeks puffed out full of food thereafter.

 

 

However his display would taunt the girl. "Hey...why are you staring at me like that?" He blinked with bewilderment. Before his spidey senses could tingle she was upon him like a panther in the forest. "Gahhh! I thought you'd be full already tiny!" He squirmed as items were being plundered and extravagant dishes reminiscent of an Asian buffet streamed out. "Nooo, my foooood! Wow..you just have a knack for being an orange player. Raiding me already!"

 

@Mutsu

 

 

[Mutsu 0]

OOC: You can roll for the treasure chest in the next post. :) It's now been ten posts.

ID: 108540
LD: 16 (MAT FOUND!)

"I'm not tiny! I'm not little! YOU'RE LITTLE! I YAM MIGHTY!" It seemed that @Black had uttered some magical type of phrase when he had called Mutsu tiny. Something in the phrase had caused her to unleash the full concentrated power of her jingling rage. Much like a classic blue furred Disney character, Mutsu's badness level upon anyone referencing her height would reach unusually high levels. Especially for someone her size. Completely ignoring the veritable fountain of food that she was dislodging from Black's pockets, the tiny ball of fury attempted to chomp down on his forearm instead. Vengeance, full and very bitey vengeance, would be hers. She was so focused on extracting her pound of flesh for the remark that she didn't even notice when she dislodged something from the forest floor that resolved itself into a crafting material.

Edited November 7, 2018 by Mutsu