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[F6-PP] Acceptance for Brokenness. <Domarus & Mina>


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Hearing her ask him what he wanted to accomplish made him snap.  She tried pushing him backward, but all she did was make him take a step back.  
     "I DON'T KNOW!!!"  he roared at her, his fists tightening.  "I DON'T KNOW OK?!  EVERYTHING I've ever known has been nothing but a lie!  EVERY truth, EVERY friendship, EVERY hope, and EVERY goal!  I've known nothing but hatred, loneliness and pain since I can remember!  The only good memory I've ever had was when I wasn't even one year old!!"  At this point tears were beginning to stream from his eyes.  When she told him she could sleep at night knowing she at least tried something he roared and swung his fist at a nearby boulder, causing a small crack to form before it repaired itself, the immortal object sign popping up above it.  In between pants he spoke.
     
"You make it sound easy...  But I..  I just..  My heart.  My mind.  My soul.  They're all in conflict with themselves..  I feel what is right, I see what is wrong, and I.."  He leaned against the rock as he shut his eyes closed.  "I don't know how.  How to just, let go...  All my life, I've sought control.  All my life, I've attempted to be my own master of the world..  Of my world I used to think...  But.  Having no control over anything..  The concept is so, alien.."  He took in a sharp, deep breath, his voice shaking with emotion.  "...Can you...  Would you...  Can I ask you, a favor?"

@tricolor_mina

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Mina looked at him, a dead look in her eyes. "What part of what I said gave you the impression that this was easy, Domarus?" she said quietly, almost inaudible to anyone but herself. "If... I were to ever make it back to the real world, I would say that I am not who I once was. I'm still me, but not me at the same time." She watched him as he raged at her, shouting at the top of his lungs. It was heartbreaking, and it would have brought tears to her eyes had he not been in dire need of comfort. "Let me make something completely clear to you." she said softly, her expression seeming to be unreadable, but ending up just being a pensive expression. She gently pressed a hand on top of his head, a shadow falling over her face. "Nobody goes through something like this completely, Its impossible. All you can do is try to break away from what had defined you at one point. You are NOT Defined by what you were, rather, you are defined by who you've become now." she gently mussed his hair, before straightening up, and looking back down at him. She heard him quietly ask her if she could do something for him. "It.. depends on what you ask of me, Domarus..." she said "Everyone has limits to what they can do, but I'll try my best to do what you're asking, ok?"

(*Note: listen to the Serious Situations music listed below in the signature spoiler!)

@Domarus

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  • 2 weeks later...

Domarus said nothing as she spoke.  He felt her hand placed on his head, but was too tired to attempt to decipher the meaning behind the action.  Defined by what he was now?  What even was he?  The only word he could say was aimless..  Or maybe broken.  Perhaps both.  He didn't know.  Then she mussed up his hair, which he again would have been confused with were it not for the fact that he was too tired to even think.  Eventually of course she reached his question.  He took a moment to steady his breathing.  He was so afraid, so weak and tired.  So lost and confused.  He wasn't concerned at all about how childish, weak or pathetic he looked.
     "Please...  Don't leave me, for too long..."  He slowly sank down to the ground, which would make any further interaction with his hair greatly easier now that he wasn't standing his full six foot six height.  "I don't want to be alone anymore..  I, need some reason to live..  I...  I'm hoping that...  By spending more time with you, I'll find one..  I just..."  He shut his eyes as the tears continued, tightening his grip.  "I can't.  I can't do it alone..  I'm too weak..."

@tricolor_mina 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Mina smiled comfortingly at Domarus when he seemed lost, confused by how she was acting. 'That boy... most definitely has a chance. He's actually got a chance.'  she thought, her smile fading slightly as he began to cry harder now, slowly sinking to the ground. Then his question... It was... unexpected, she supposed, but expected as well... if that made any sense. He just didn't want to be left alone anymore, which didn't surprise her at all. Mina caught him before he could fully fall to the ground, and had him stand up properly again. mina looked up at him, before breaking out into a grin. "Mou... maybe you need something funny to cheer you up this time?" she said cheerfully, before abruptly vanishing from in front of him, and kicking him in the back of his knees, sending him flying towards the water. Mina lept into the air after him, nearly sideways so that even if he did manage to right himself from her sudden surprise attack, he wouldn't manage that for long. "BANZAIIIIII!" she squealed, giggling as she flew through the air.

@Domarus

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Even when the man had an ulterior motive and he was overanalyzing everything and everyone.  Even that man would never have seen what was to come...  Though he might be prepared for it nonetheless.  In the middle of his tears she mentioned something odd.  Something about...  Funny to cheer him up?  His confusion wasn't strong though, too overcome by...  Well everything else he was feeling.  When she knocked him into the water however his eyes widened with shock before he fell in.  Causing a massive wave to splash onto Mina.  Being more muscle than fat, he slowly sank to the bottom.  Eyes still wide as the water flowed into his lungs, his mind was still in shock trying to wrap around what just happened.  In a full minute he had managed to process the information, even as his health was slowly beginning to climb down.  She...  Kicked him into the water?  But why?  She said something about funny.  Did she just pull a prank on him?  While he was breaking down?  Why would she do that?  Was this how normal people lived??  If that were so did that mean he had to keep his guard up all the time?!  Or was that not the point?  But if it wasn't then what if he was attacked by a player killer?  He couldn't have his guard down the- oh sh*t his health.  Remembering where he was he swam to the surface and gasped for air when he broke through.  After one cough all the water burst from his lungs and his health started to climb back up.
     
"I..  I can't....  Why did...  I'm so confused..."

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  • 2 weeks later...

Mina tackled Domarus from behind, yanking the taller man into a bear hug, and hopped up high enough to almost climb on his shoulders. Mina wrapped her arms around him to keep herself in place. "Mou, stop being confused!" she said, laughing at him a little bit more. "I'm not doing this for any ulterior motives, nor am I just using this as an excuse to prank you, so quit looking into it so deeply! I just want you to lighten up a bit!" Mina continued laughing while she sat on his back, her usually gruff expression melting slightly, showing a slight bit of happiness through the cracks. He reminded her of someone from the real world, but only a little. Mina supposed that it was just the ever-questioning demeanor that he had! she climbed up a bit more, so that she was actually sitting on his shoulders. "Mou, I hope you don't mind~ I wanted to have a better view!" she said cheerfully, mussing his hair as she spoke. "While you're here, I'd like you to know that I won't abandon you, not now, not ever!

@Domarus

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Domarus felt Mina tackle him from behind, though even in the water he was hard pressed to lose balance..  When he could see it coming that is.  "Hey!  Mina wha-"  Then he heard her give him an order..  Or, was it an order?  It's all he ever knew really.  Until he figured out what it was, he'd just call it an order.  She ordered him to stop being confused...  Which only confused him even more.  "...I-I'm sorry, I don't-"  He heard her laugh and continue talking.  How she had no ulterior motive.  How she wasn't doing this as an excuse to prank him.  Domarus blinked.  And people accused him of reading minds.  When you practiced reading people's thoughts was easy...  Was he the same or was this just a lucky guess?  She told him to stop looking into it so deeply and how she wanted him to lighten up just a bit.  Domarus was still very confused.  He didn't know how to act honestly.  Lighten up?  That was something he could act, but had never felt.  Did that even count?  He turned his head to look at her and ask her this, but.  When he saw that hint of happiness in her...  After all that depression and brokenness earlier.  His mouth opened, nearly asking her how she could be so happy...  But then he stopped.  Saying something like that...  could make it vanish.  He closed his mouth again and just focused on the happiness displayed on her face.

Then she pushed herself up onto his shoulders, breaking his view and causing him to look forward again.  His own face lost in thought, though she wouldn't be able to see it from her point of view.  When she mussed his hair again and mentioned how she wanted a better view, he thought about all this...  Maybe...  This is what I can do.  Make others happy.  But, how do I do that?...  How did I get so good at manipulating people?  I experimented...  Would that be wrong?  To experiment on how to make people happy?  He closed his eyes and took a deep breath...  No..  No, he'd worry about this later.  Right now..  A ghost of a smile spread on his face before he reached over, grabbed her legs, and flipped her forward into the water.  "An eye for an eye as they say Mina,"  he said with a small chuckle.

@tricolor_mina

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Mina let out a shriek as she was suddenly thrown off of his shoulders and into the water. She ended up floating right back up again, but that was besides the point. Mina finally broke the surface, coughing and gasping for air. Her health had even gone down a bit from the quick little swim, despite her having only gone under for a few moments. "Mou, an eye for an eye huh?" she gasped, shaking her head free from water. She grinned at Domarus, legitimately happy that he had actually decided to get her back for dunking him into the water before. "I'm glad you didn't miss an opportunity to get me back, Ne~ You made me go for a swim!" Mina was easily able to tread water until she reached the part of the water where she could stand up and be halfway out of the water. she smiled brightly, taking note of the faint ghost of a smile that he had given, as well as his faint chuckling. He really was feeling better now, if only a little. It made her feel happier to see that.
@Domarus

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Domarus didn't know where to go from here.  He'd gotten her back, he made her smile even laugh...  Now what?  He wasn't sure what to do.  He was making this up as he went along.  He thought for a moment and remembered how she said she was climbing on him to get a better view...  A better view...  His eyes looked up for a second before he looked back down.  "Well yes.  It's refreshing isn't it?"  he said as he grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the water.  He pulled her up, hoisting her onto his shoulders again.  "I believe you said something about wanting to get a better view?  Hold on."  With that he began to walk through the forest.  Specifically uphill.  As he did he was silent for a little, deep in thought.  "...Thanks..."  He was specifically thanking her for promising to never leave him, but she could imagine it to be thanks for anything.  For he was, technically, grateful for just having someone like her to talk to.  Before she could ask him what he was thanking her for, he took the final few steps before they reached a cliffside.  He pulled her down and let her see the sight:  The waterfall was to the right, with the pool of water below it.  Beyond that were the vast trees and the sun overlooking it all as it slowly climbed it's way into dusk.  In a few minutes the sky's color would be changing.  "How's this for a view?...  Originally I found this place for the sake of spying on players in this floor...  Even now it's hard for me to focus on anything but...  I'm, hoping to see the world one day, as you see it."

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Mina was laughing at her current situation. She was soaking wet, she'd been pranked by someone who had previously been extremely tense, and she had climbed his shoulders prior to having been thrown over his head and into the pool of water. She jolted in surprise when she felt herself getting pulled out of the water by her arm. She pulled herself up the rest of the way, and to her surprise, Domarus actually pulled her onto his shoulders, and simply started walking. '... huh..?' Mina was about to voice a question she had, when he said something about her wanting a better view. "Mou... you don't have to do this..." she said softly before she heard him say thank you. Mina blinked. "I kicked you into the water as a prank." She deadpanned, "I dont feel like that deserves a t- Oh!" Mina gasped in shock at the beautiful view. Orange and gold mixed with blue, white, and purple to make an image that looked as though it came out of a painting. Mina watched the colors shift slowly towards an even more vibrant coloring. Mina felt a single tear roll down her face at the gorgeous sight. She had almost forgotten how beautiful the sunset was... the thoughtful mood changed abruptly when Domarus mentioned that he bad often used this spot for spying on other players. A tic mark appeared on her face before she bonked him on the head, letting out an irritated noise as she did so. "Jeez, were you really that shady back then?" She said grumpily, glancing down at him. "if you're really changing your ways, then no more stalking players, ne? If I catch you doing that anymore, I'll hit you over the head with Yakimba!" She threatened, a menacing look on her face. Despite only being level 15, she could still scare more experienced players with her glare.

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Hearing Mina's disapproving voice on how shady he had been reminded him of just how bad it was.  Before he could feel any worse however, she threatened to hit him with something called...  Yakim, ba?  Something like that.  If he ever spied on people again.  He wasn't exactly scared of Mina, or her look.  He'd had many terrifying glares at him in his past, so it didn't exactly throw him off.  Still..  'There's no way I can predict this girl...'  At any rate he better answer her.  "U-um...  Yes, I had an underground information network set up.  I found places they could keep track of players from a distance, this was one of them.  I promise I have no intention of spying on anyone again.  I truly do wish to start right this time..."  With that he looked away, and towards the ground.  He didn't know what to say at this point.  The small spark of enjoyment was gone.  Replaced by the despair of remembering and realizing just how far his sins went.  He'd been focused on the more horrid things like manipulating others, murder, and other such crimes.  He didn't even think about the countless smaller crimes he'd done.  And to try to even imagine that.......

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Mina took note of the small amount of confusion hed shown when she mentioned smacking him with Yakimba. "Its a sword that a good friend of mine gave me." She said, looking up at the clouds. "He wanted me to have it. It's a demonic item, which makes it better than most other items you can get, unless it's a  unique."Mina paled slightly when she realized that she had somehow managed to make Domarus more depressed. At this, Mina let out a tired sigh, before patting the tall man on the head, and closing her eyes. "Mou, I'm sorry if I made you feel any worse..." she said softly. "I appreciate you bringing Me here, Domarus... it's beautiful... it kinda reminds me of a place I visited once in the 'states when I was working as a rookie cop doing grunt work" mina thought back to the many hiking trips she'd gone on with her co-workers, climbing some of the mountains in the 'states. She particularly loved the view she'd seen from the blue ridge mountains.

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He listened to her as she explained how Yakimba was a demonic sword given to her by a friend.  Ah, with context that made her threat a lot more real.  Though seeing as how he was far stronger than her, the threat still didn't mean much outside of her glare.  He remembered when he schemed to get his hands on uniques and demonics.  Whether it was by stealing from others, or by calculation and timing during an event or boss raid.  He mentally cursed himself for thinking of doing something like that.  He felt her pat his head again, which was still weird to feel but he still didn't question it.  He had no right to deny anyone do anything to him after what he had done.  When she apologized for making him feel worse he turned to look at her.  "N-no you didn't!  It's just...  I realized just how much I've done...  Up until now, I only thought about the people I manipulated, or killed.  I never even thought of my lesser crimes...  Invasion of privacy...  Stealing...  Even making others drunk just to get information...  Remembering that those count too, I...  I don't think I'll ever even guess the vast number of crimes I've committed."  He heard her thank him for taking her there, and his feet shifted in response.  When she told him she was once a cop his eyes widened slightly and turned to look at her.  "Are you, telling me that I just confessed my sins to law enforcement?"

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"Ex. Ex law enforcement." Said mina quietly, a gloomy look crossing her face. "I lost my job due to a shootout that got my good friend killed, and ended with nearly 10 others dying, and almost 30 others having to be hospitalized,  myself included in that number. I was initially counted among the innocent, but they falsely linked me with one of the terrorists." She shuddered silently, shaking her head. Her eyes welled up with tears, falling into a choked silence. Her guilt hadn't decreased at all after these few years... not even a little. She still remembered the warm gun... "one of them stole my gun off of me, I hadn't noticed till I was on the ground, dazed, bruised, and bleeding... and my friend was flat on his back, not moving, not even a little." Mina felt like she was drowning in her thoughts, the pain causing her face to change into her battle-hardened mask, the face she used without even knowing it if she didnt want to show what she was currently feeling. Now that she actually had the time to think back about what happened, she did understand that wasnt her fault, but it had still gotten her arrested, and have her gun liscence, her freedom, and her livelihood, her job as a police officer, taken away. Even if she survived this death trap, she'd still be unable to do the job she loved ever again."even if I were a cop still, I wouldn't turn you away. My job was to help people, to help them better themselves... not to shut them out and let them suffer in silence and slowly get worse and worse." Mina hopped off of his shoulders, before walking over to the edge of the Cliff, and sitting down, allowing her legs to hang off of the side.

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Hearing her state her story made him feel like they talked about this already...  But he couldn't quite put his finger on it...  At any rate it was clear it was weighing on her like his was with him.  "...Well...  If it's any consolation, you never meant for it to happen.  Whereas everything I've done was my choice, and mine alone..."  He listened to her tell him how she wouldn't have turned him away, even if she was still a cop.  When she slipped down and sat on the edge of the cliff Domarus sighed.  "Pretty sure that's not your call to make.  If you were a cop, your job would be to arrest me and let the public decide...  Pretty sure what the verdict would be..."  Domarus pulled out the photo of his mother as he stood behind Mina...  He wondered how she would feel about everything he'd done...  Would she even care about him after it all?  His free hand tightened, and he fought the urge to cry.  Succeeding, he took a silent breath before he moved to put the picture back in his inventory.

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Mina sighed. "Look, I know damn well that I did what i could after the fact, but that doesnt change the fact that I got my boss killed because I didnt check my holster." Her voice was tired, and somewhat strained now. "It physically hurts like I pulled the trigger myself. And the fact that damn near everyone thinks I killed him didnt help me in the slightest." Mina glanced up at him, before shaking her head when he mentioned that she'd still arrest him probably. "Of course I'd arrest you, dummy." She said dryly "I really wouldn't have a choice with you in all honesty. I can't use my own discretion for a felony charge, and I'd lose my job anyways if I did. I would encourage you to seek out therapy and get a psychological examination, but that's besides the point. I would actively try to help you get better. You dont help the damaged by hurting them more. That's how you get mass murderers and sociopaths like Jeffrey Dahmer and Ted Bundy." Mina closed her eyes, a tired look on her face. She thought about her friend for a good little while, growing more upset over him than usual. Some days it just seemed to weigh on her conciousness, she guessed. There wasnt anything she could do about it, either... not without hurting someone over it. That someone being herself. There were just some days where she wanted to jump off of one of Aincrads many cliffs, and just end her own suffering. Maybe she'd get to see him again if she did.. which made it very tempting to her.

"Mou... I miss you so much, Declan..." her words were faint, and almost inaudible, but could be picked up on by someone listening intently to her...

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Domarus stood there in silence for a rather long time before he finally, albeit hesitantly, sat down beside her on the cliffside.  Domarus looked down the cliff, knowing they'd die if they fell.  Would that really be bad?  It would be instantaneous.  No one would miss him.  He'd finally pay for his crimes...  But would his mother want it?  He'd never know because she died before he was even a year old.  His father certainly wouldn't care.  He heard her last words but didn't comment on it..  He didn't want to pry into her personal life.  It was her personal life for a reason.  And he'd invaded privacy too long already.  "...So then...  The two of us.  One wrongly accused by others and herself of being a murderer.  And a murderer and manipulator seeking redemption but unable to find his way...  Know any good therapists in here or are we out of luck?"  He was fully serious, but he doubted there would be any who could successfully cover their issues.

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Mina sat there for a while longer, just staring wistfully at the slowly darkening sky. She reached a hand up, straining her reach towards the sky, as if she were reaching for something. She eventually looked behind her when domarus spoke again, talking about the crimes committed by each of them, and how they both were an absolute mess. Mina smiled faintly, before getting up, and running to the right, to where she was near the waterfall. A deep, and strong gust of wind swept over the area, causing her cloak to billow out behind herself. She spread her arms out wide, before twirling around to face Domarus again. "Just living out our own lives is about the only thing we can do till we reach the real world again." She called, out, her face one of accepting calm, her eyes closed, and her mouth in a closed-mouth smile. She took a step backwards, then another, and another... until she simply kicked off the ground, sending herself nearly a foot up in the air, and over the waterfall, before she fell, disappearing from sight entirely. If domarus looked over the cliff, he wouldn't see Mina, though she was perfectly fine.

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Domarus' eyes widened when he saw her beginning to step backward.  "Mina wait stop!"  His eyes widened further when she actually jumped backward.  Domarus activated the charge skill and leaped down after her at an angle so he could actually reach her.  He grabbed her with both arms as the two fell, splashing against the falling water as they did so...  Now what?  This was the first time he had ever done something without a plan.  But if he was going to die saving her then so be it.  Still, he'd prefer not to die if at all possible.  So he thought fast.  He quickly opened his inventory and pulled his ax out with his right hand.  After that he swung it into the cliffside, burying the blade deep in the stone which slowed their descent greatly.  When they reached the bottom they were flung onto land where the two rolled a bit.  Domarus panted heavily.  Weaponless and exhausted, his heart racing.  "Don't ever...  Do that...  Again...  EVER..."

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Mina heard Domarus cry out for her to stop. 'Did he miss the fact that I did this earlier?' She thought, opening her eyes in suddenly felt his arm wrap around her, then another, pulling her against him. She turned to face him, and was jolted by his expression. He had a look of utter panic on his face, and seemed to be thinking about the fact that they both might die from this. Mina deadpanned when she noticed this. "Baka! That's not how you stop someone from jumping off a cliff!" She shrieked, a tic mark appearing on her face. "If I'd have actually jumped to kill myself, you'd die with me if you did what you just did!" She heard the sound of metal scraping against stone, before she felt the metaphorical air get knocked out of her lungs when she landed on her back. It took her a few moments to recollect herself and sit up, but when she did, she saw domarus wheezing, and begging her not to do that again. "Kid, I knew damn well what I was doing, I did that earlier!" She wheezed, giving him a look of wide-eyed exasperation. "I would've been fine even if you didnt pull this stunt just now! *koff koff!*"

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