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PP – F2: Is this real or just a fantasy? (Celes)


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Mari had a tendency to dwell on things, a lot. She hadn’t gotten the chance to properly speak to Alkor after that night in the cave when she had confided in him, and the two shared intimate moments. Falling asleep together, a small kiss, and learning each other’s real names. It was something Mari kept pushing into the back of her mind, but today it just didn’t stay away.

What were these feelings? She could say she cared for him, but Mari could also say she cared for a lot of other people.  â€œRarrghh…” Mari gave a frustrated mumble as she sat against a tree in the forest; scuffing up her hair.

“Shut up brain.”

 

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Celes saw Mari ruffing her hair and chuckled. "Is everything okay sweetie?" She had thought of visiting mari, so che stopped to get some warm food in one of her favorite shops. She brought out the soba and offered it to Mari "This is tasty, and bound to take some of your troubles away" She added with a wink. Celes was from the school of thought that a good meal could cure any ailments of the heart. 

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Mari jumped, not expecting anyone to be there, much less Celes. "Geez..." Mari mumbled, clearly more flustered than usual. Her cheeks flushed as she glanced away giving another mumble, incoherent noises. Celes sat down next to Mari. "I'm fine." Mari muttered as she turned back to Celes, accepting the bowl of noodles, "Soba? Isn't that sort of a new years thing?" She asked skeptically. Still, she had less than graciously accepted it, hearing her stomach grumble. Mari slurped some up, quickly so Celes couldn't catch her with another question.

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Celes laughed "New years?!? good food comes in all shapes, sizes, and times. I just found a great noodle shop on the fourth floor, their soba was exquisite. You know, I have my hobbies" She winked. She what have you been doing down here? Visiting...?" She let the question drop, knowing ti would be no good to finish it. Whatever she was doing here was hers, but still she was a good enough friend. She looked down and focused on her soba

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Mari nodded, as she chewed her noodles. Swallowing she continued. "Mmm, actually...I just came back from the 9th floor. I hate it there, it's so hot and stuffy. Ugh. How anyone can stand it is beyond me, I hate the floor so much. If I had it my way I would never, ever go there." 

Mari shrugged a she stuffed her mouth with more noodles, waiting to finish before speaking again. "I like your hobbies. They keep me well fed. These are really nice, uh -thank you." Mari said, as she absently began stirring the remaining noodles with her fork. How would she tell her friend she had to kill again? Mari felt it best to just outright say it.

"I....had to kill someone again recently...it was more of a mercy killing than anything else...heh...his  brother actually thanked me. So I went to the 9th floor to talk to someone about it....god I hate that floor."

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Celes was surprised to hear about the killing from mari, but that was okay... " i had hard from someone else... actually. But, Mari, I trust you, you had your reasons, and i trust your judgement more than anyone..." She sighed remembering her adventures on the ninth "I was up there gathering materials. I fought too many big things. It was.... hard..." she said with a frown "It too hot and gloomy, but at least we are going to fight to make it through, to the other side... "

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Mari glanced up at Celes, who had said she trusted Mari, more so than anyone - or at least her judgement. Mari bit her lip and sighed. There were so very few people she wholy trusted. 3 in total, and 1 of which refused to talk to her, or acknowledge her existence. "Could say the same to you." Mari said with a small smile.

Mari nodded in agreement with Celes, "Yeh - it was too hot but it wasn't really all that bad in this cave I-" Mari stopped herself, finding herself blushing again, at the realization she had so easily began to talk to Celes about what occured on the floor. The moments between herself and Alkor.

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Celes blushed when Mari told her that she trusted her too. Celes was willing to live and die for Mari, she felt happy to have a friend she could trust this way. Celes had never seem mari so flustered. When she stopped mid sentence celes couldnt help but be curious "Mari.. the cave..? why was it nice..?" She smiled a  bit. she liked seeing Mari this way. 

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"uurrghhhh"  Mari made an odd noise as she burried her face in her hands, then bought her knees up to bury her face in those. Celes had asked an innocent question, fueled by curiosity. Of course, it was bound to be asked. "Celes..." Mari whined, voice muffled  by her legs. "I'm not good at dealing with this stuff. I don't know what to think or feel. I don't know what to -arghhh..." She moaned again, not exactly providing Celes with a good enough answer just yet. 

Mari took a few deep breaths, slowly lifting her face from her hands and knees, cheeks a few shades redder than they were moments before. "Alkor....." She mumbled.

 

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Celes got up and sat down next to her, She crossed her legs and leaned her head into mari's shoulder, chuckling. "Alright, why dont you start with the story, then we can go over you feelings, huh? What's an...Alkor? Tell me about it?" She asked, draping her arm over the girl's shoulder. "I got you, Lets take this slow, yeh?" she smiled warmly, cuddling her. 

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Mari smiled, happily as she rested her head against Celes. Whom had shifted to sit next to her. The presence of the other woman calmed her down, and her question couldn't help but make Mari laugh. "Heh, Alkor is a person. A quiet, withdrawn person....focused on battling, he is a man of few words...and holds people at an arms distance. No, more so than that. ahahaa, yet..." Mari trailed off. Giving her head a slight shake as she reached out and clasped Celes' hand, giving it a small squeeze.
 
"Please, be sure not to repeat things to anyone? Please?"
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Celes laughed "who would I repeat this to? You are my dear, and I havent met this alkor dude yet.. so..."  she trailed of as she scooched closer to Mari "Look, you said you trusted me, right? I'm safe okay? I'm your friend, I love you, and I will always care for you, got that?" SHe hugged ehr friend and held her close for a second. 

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Mari bit her lower lip giving a small shrug, still feeling flustered. Mari leaned into Celes. Closing her eyes for a moment, enjoying the warmth from the other girl. "You're right." Mari said with a small sigh. "This subject just isn't one I'm used to. See, Alkor he's...we sorta-" Mari shifted her head, hiding her face into Celes' shoulder. "We may have kissed - and I mean. I've kissed others before, obviously but this makes me feel different. I might just be getting sick or something." 

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Celes smiled, stifling laughter. How could this woman, who was so mature, be so innocent..."Mari, did it ever possibly occur to you" she said gently, not wanting to startle her "That you might possibly like him? that the feeling you have is maybe of affection?" Asking could be difficult, but maybe she liked this guy. That could be good for Mari...

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Mari furrowed her eyebrows, attempting to shoot Celes a dark look, but it ended up looking like a flustered pout instead. "Yes! I'm not stupid...this doesn't...ugh..." Mari wasn't sure how to describe what she felt.

"I know what it feels like to care about someone, but this feels...off... It hurts."

She wrapped her arms around her waist and allowed her blue eyes to travel to the floor. "I've been the happiest I have been in a long time- but it hurts - I don't do feelings."

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"It hurst like... you miss him? like it hurts to not be close? or did he hurt you. Because if he hurt you I swear" she tried her best to look tough for mari. She may be half joking now, but she would never hesitate to defend her friend. If someone hurt her, there would be hell to pay. She would make sure of that. She leaned close to mari once more and hugged her "I wont let anyone hurt you like that again, got it?"

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Mari stifled a small laugh, "it's funny... When we first met - he threatened to kill me, who would have known that we would end up kissing in some remote cave on the 9th floor?" Mari asked, unconsciously raising her fingers to trace her lips.

"But no...he hasn't hurt me." Mari made an airy, happy sound as she shifted her head from Celes' shoulder and allowed it to fall into the other girls lap, she closed her eyes. "I'm not sure, I do miss him - but I don't feel the need to be around him constantly. I know he is alive; he's fighting, and that's enough for me..." Mari opened her eyes to look up at Celes, "Yanno?"

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Celes smiled sadly. She thought of Maggie, her love. Of how...  Does she know i'm fighting? is that enough for her? what does she do does she visit my sleeping body like a fcensored fairytale? Would she give u- no sle loves me as much as i love her, she wouldnt give up and ... she would never want me to give up. If i fight i fight ofr us. that is enough. it has to be....  I think. God i wish i knew... i wish i could tell her how much i love her... i miss her... i... 

 

"yeah, i know." 

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Mari frowned when Celes seemed downcast - her eyes lowering as she smiled a sad smile. Mari sat back up, feeling guilty. She forgot that Celes had someone on the outside, someone she loved and missed. Alkor had someone like that too. Mari...Mari didn't really have anyone waiting for her on the outside - so she felt less inclined to miss anyone, or reality for that matter. She simply did what she had to do. Mari didn't know what it was like to have someone waiting on the outside, nor what it was supposed to feel like. 

"I'm sure she knows you're in here, kicking and screaming to get back to her." Mari said, placing an arm around her shoulder. Mari didn't know what Celes was thinking, but that look - she could take a solid guess. "And...I'm sure that's enough for her too."

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Celes tried to smile. Sometimes it just hurt to think about it..."So tell me, what are you feeling? You ok?... also I know youre grown, but.... you know its okay to feel this stuff. I know... with everything you lost... Feelings like this, they could seem out of place, yeah? But i think that its good, like, healthy. Because.. these feelings can help you get better and i think anyone that loves would want you to be happy.. at least "She looked down blushing "I know i do..."

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