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(OP-F9) Uncertainty


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"It's been a while since I'm trapped inside this game."

"I didn't have any story or whatsoever as I travel the floors of Aincrad."

"All this time, I have been treating this game as a normal game; you get strong and you will win."

"For that, I have been doing nothing but grinding the whole time by myself, keeping all the rewards to myself. So much for being nice, Yuji. Have you ever help someone?"

"As I get stronger, I look at myself everyday in the mirror. Something's missing."

"I look at the others on the field, they're more stronger than me."

"Where did I go wrong? Eventhough this is a game of death, beating this game would be the same as completing any RPG game."

 

"Where did I go wrong...."

"How did they get stronger...how?"

 

The swirling flames in the lava can melt someone if they fall down. I step back slowly and enter the village; watching the players passing me by without batting an eye. 

 

"...Tch."

 

This feeling. This emptiness. Am I a ghost or something? Why did people ignore me? My friend die left and right, some abandon me. I want new friends, people ignore me when I talk to them. The only thing I'm good at for them is to dish out damage, after that I have no use. What must I do? What must I change?

 

"SOMEONE TELL ME, DAMN IT!"

 

I'm not sure with myself anymore. All this time I have been doing nothing but talk big, I didn't do one of that thing at all. I remember saying out loud I will reach Lvl 10 in a day. What happen? I reach them in one week instead. I lust over a girl I never met before. What did I get? Total ignorance from that girl.

 

I swear I will be nice, that I will help people. I didn't do anything of that sort. I bore them instead. I act tough, not wanting other people help. Isolation they reward me. I trouble people for the first time I arrive in this game, not even a newbie would dare do that.

 

I throw my Cocytus into the volcano. Within instant I lost the item. I don't care, that equipment didn't benefit me whatsoever as they did not get approval from the system. It should never exist in this game.

 

"If a player were to kill me in this game because I annoy them, I'll accept that fate with pleasure."

 

I walk to the center of the village and sit down. I'm not feeling any of the heat right now, not in this state. I just look up to the sky as I contemplating.

 

(Lose Cocytus)

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"Urgh...that was close! I would be a dead burned meat instantly If I'll be much clumsy!" It was her duty now to go about higher floors. What for? Adventure? No. Shizuka was trying to be strong enough to survive this vicious system. She knew she cant fight mobs on this floor yet, but who knows there might be somebody who would be concerned enough to at least ponder how valuable life was.

 

As a performer, she regularly gives a public performance either at the Starting City or at Urbus. This time, Shizuka would try to voluntarily render a song for everybody, -one that was a lively,joyous song. "If Eliza and father Gerry would come, I'm sure it would be better."

 

It was one of her firsts, to perform alone on a floor she entered for the first time. She stood still, looking around the place. Some were busy, some idle, and one who was anxious. Shizuka had progressed to overpower her social phobia, but there were still times wherein she felt uneasy.

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"Sitting alone like this won't help me clear away my problem...I need to make my amend to people I wronged. I should start with that Lessa girl. How should I do that if she didn't want to see me..."

 

The sky further worsen the emptiness in my heart. I look ahead at the people in the center instead. This village has become the base for the front liners. Their next target will be the Hydra, a Floor 9 Raid Boss which is exactly tomorrow. He too will join the fight. 

 

I look around and spotted a girl with her musical instrument in her hand. She watch everyone, including me with the look of nervousness. I don't know what she want to do with that instrument in her hand, but a performer here in my situation right now could be a temporary medicine to heal my heart. I stand up and change my seat to a seat near her.

 

"I would appreciate it if you could play me any song. Everyone here would feel the same too. Don't be nervous and just play whatever you want."

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Arthonnen would suddenly materialize onto the the 9th floor. Looking around the lava world he gave a long drawn out sigh as he stepped off the pedestal into the village. Scanning the area quickly taking not on the NPC's, quest givers, and players. Arthonnen was not ready to be here yet, he close to being able to take something on, but that would just be some normal mob. He herd one the lower floors that the assault was going after this boss soon. He had come to this level to try and gauge this floor, see if he spent the time trying to grind up today. If he would make it for the floor boss in time.

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"I would appreciate it if you could play me any song. Everyone here would feel the same too. Don't be nervous and just play whatever you want." Shizuka turned around and saw the guy sit nearer, whom she referred to as the anxious one. He was alone, he was not waiting for somebody, the guy was really lonely. How could she tell it? Kayaba Akihiko perfectly replicated human emotions as depicted by the gloomy player. Just as he told her the request, Shizuka expressed a smile and a slight bow then thought of something that would cheer up the ambience.

 

Currently holding a guitar, she made sure it was fine tuned. She adjusted the guitar strap just right and started out the instrumental part, decided to play 'Life in Technicolor II'. Playing while recording the song, made her vague emotions be clearer.  "There's a wild wind blowing, down the corner of my street..." Shizuka did her dearest vocal rendering to lessen the negative tones of Floor 9. "It goes o-o-on time only can lead you on..."

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After she adjust her guitar, she pluck the guitar string, thus beginning her performance. I watch at the crowd forward as they begin to relax while listening to her voice and the sound of the guitar. It's a perfect song in this occasion as everyone look so intense earlier.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXSovfzyx28

 

Another person enter the scene. I just glance at him for awhile before indulging back to her singing. 

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Celes heard the music first, walking toward the man she she sat and listened for a while. She looked like any other player. Glaive at her back, she tried to look as unimpressive as she could. But she knew she was ready at any moment. It had been a long time since she had felt weak and afraid, and she let that confidence shine through as best she can. 

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Arthonnen paused for a moment, glancing over at the performers perking an eyebrow at them. It seemed a bit strange to him looking around at all the grim look on everyone's face, but only to be greeted by a lovely melody to try and bring up the mood. He let out a sigh taking a seat for a moment glancing around as if inspecting his surroundings. Arthonnen had to wonder to himself just what his fate would be in the world. Members of the assault team here on the ninth floor looked so grim. Only one silver lining to be seen, as the music seemed to lift some moods.

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"For what reason I being nice..."

"For what reason I create needless drama..."

"Why am I acting like I know it all..."

 

"Am I trying to get people attention so much....?"

 

The music continue to allure me. My head gets clearer as I think back my wrongdoing with the help of her music. As the train of thoughts pass over me, a woman approach me and sit next to me. I don't know why she would choose this seat among many seat in this center. The singing voice of the girl must have attracted her though. I didn't think much of it, let her feel the emotion of the performer for they will need it.

 

The voice that soothes the soul.

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When the song was about to end, she noticed more listening ears as if it was some important announcement. Deep inside, she was really happy to be able to do something for others without any pay backs. For her, to give was felicity, whether it was material or not. Shizuka wanted to thank all of them who purely strive to end fool Akihiko's system, even though their only, precious lives were put to great risks.

 

This meaningless burden affected everybody including Shizuka. And so, she made music as her consolation against the psychological trauma and social phobia she had. Another song was performed by her. Letting her soul express thankfulness, she got her <<Symphony of Sphere >> transformed into a piano and sang 'A thousand years'.

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As she end her first song, everyone have calm down a little. Stressing out won't help any of us to conquer the next floor. I pity myself to be consume by my own emotion. I should have just accept myself for who I am and continue pushing myself forward. In that sense, the negative trait inside me must be fix.

 

Her sphere shape crystal change shape to a piano as she prepare herself for another song. Each key that she press will produce melancholic sound. The song she play now remind me of my loved one, mainly my family. I look down as the memories of me with my family begin to play inside my head like a recording tape.

 

"One more reason to get out from this game...."

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