[SP F1] A delayed start

[Kharn 0]

Two years. That is how long Kharn had toiled to at long last escape from the confines of his accidental prison. To think, he, a mighty beserker of Khorne, was defeated by a simple by a simple wooden inn door. He had to admit, it was a bit shameful that it had not even taken him a day to forget the innermost workings of the menu system. He had gone to sleep with the key in his inventory and realized with dawning horror he next morning that he no longer remembered how to get it back out. Oh how he had RAGED. Days of pacing turned into months of screaming and finally into years of flailing about senselessly in rage. He was honestly surprised no one had come to investigate, but then again the inn was rather out of the way and the only ones there besides him was a couple of NPCs. One day however, he had finally gotten lucky and managed to accidentally make the menu opening motion. Of course, due to his flailing, it closed shortly after.

[Kharn 0]

Kharn immediately froze. He had seen that menu opening and knew it wasn't a figment of his imagination. He desperately tried to imitate the motion with limited success, until he FINALLY pulled it of thirty minutes later. With trembling hands, he selected inventory and at long last selected the dingy rusted key that had been the only thing between him and freedom for months. Tears welled up in the corners of his eyes. At long last, this Khorne sent trial was over, and he could finally leave this accursed room. He slid the key into the lock and with an oh so satisfying click it opened, letting Kharn witness the sights of an old run down inn. True, it wasn't the most glorious view (in his own opinion that would be a massive battle) but to Kharn, after two years in that accursed room it seemed like a work of art. Still, he paid it no heed as he charged forwards and out the inns doors into glorious sunlight.

[Kharn 0]

He was blinded at first. After all, going from the murky darkness of an inn to the blinding light of a beautiful Aincrad morning was a huge transition to make after two years of said murky darkness. But it was he appreciated none the less. He looked around, and charged the first person he saw, battle cry violating the peaceful silence of the morning. A very long talk with some nice heavily armored player later, Kharn learned that not only could he not harm anyone while in a city (or safe zone as they called it) but that PKing was looked down upon and that he really shouldn't do it in the opinions of said much stronger people. Kharn thus decided that there was no point standing around such a boring place and added this whole "No kill zone" thing to his growing list of reasons for swearing a blood oath to murder Kayaba Akihiko. First he made that ridiculously difficult menu system, then he made objects immortal so he couldn't even break down the door or shatter furniture to alleviate his fury, and now this. Truly, that...thing seemed to do nothing but create things for the explicit purpose of irritating him. He sighed. 'Oh well, might as well see how long that cost me' he thought. So he checked the play clock, and then uttered his first coherent word in two years. "wat"

[Kharn 0]

Two years. That stupid incompetent overly COMPLICATED MENU HAD COST HIM TWO YEARS OF CRUSADING IN THE BLOOD GODS NAME!? Nearby player began slowly inching away as the strange man that no one recalled seeing before began to froth at the mouth. He couldn't believe it. A door had held him prisoner for two years because of this stupid menu system. This was beyond enraging. Kayaba would PAY for this indignity. It was a direct assault on his integrity as a warrior. Kharn's thoughts had unfortunately began what psychology would refer to as a rage spiral, a self perpetuating circle of rage and hatred that just caused the individual in question to get angrier and angrier as it wen on and on.

[Kharn 0]

Kharn turned to a rather nervous looking player that had yet to take the initiative and retreat. "YOU!" he spat, the word coming out as barely more than a hiss. "M-m-e?" the unfortunate player half stated, half asked. "Where can I go to kill something. Tell me or TAKE ITS PLACE!". While it was true he couldn't actually hurt the player, Kharn was far to furious to actually care about silly things like the games coding at the moment. It didn't help that the kind of players who camped out in the first town were generally those that thought slimes were terrifying, and this on was being yelled at by at 6'8 pile of muscle and rage. The decision didn't take much considering to come to a conclusion.

[Kharn 0]

"Out of the city! There are like mobs and boars and stuff! I-I've never gone myself, but you can kill them so pleasedonthurtmeeeeeeeeeeeee!" the poor player said, cowering behind his crossed arms. Kharn seemed to consider it. "THANK YOU. HAVE A NICE DAY". With that, the beserker wandered off in search of his new prey, leaving behind a befuddled main street and a player in desperate need of new pants. After a while, he finally realized he had no idea where he was going. So he asked one of the NPC guards for directions. With that done, he finally arrived at the front gate, ready for anything and desperate for a fight. He took his first new step out into a brand new world...and promptly tripped over a pebble. "Not. One. Word." he growled at the NPC guards at the gate who, being NPCs, failed to respond.

[Kharn 0]

Kharn had to admit, whoever designed these fields truly knew what they were doing. He could see each speck of dirt and numerous patterns in the dirt, indicating the passage of earth worms. If only they had been in charge of the menu system instead of Kayaba he lamented, then that whole fiasco would likely have never happened. On the bright side, now that he was so far behind, this game might actually be challenging. The smile brought a crooked smile to Kharn's lips. Truly, there were good parts in everything.

[Kharn 0]

The journey across the field ha done a good job of cooling Kharn's temper, but it still brightly burned. Not hot enough that he could not appreciate the natural beauty of this world he now lived in, but enough that he felt if he didn't kill something soon, he was going to have a little 'chat' with that player from before. If that player knew what was occurring at that moment, he would likely have something somewhat controversial to say on the matter. "Thank god for random encounters" For at that moment, Kharn's patience was finally rewarded.

[Kharn 0]

A splash of pixels formed on nearby terrain, forming into a mob that every player of SAO had seen at some point or the other. A boar. For some reason, Kharn was extremely tempted to shout out "A wild boar has appeared" and start humming an incredibly catchy tune. Kharn shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. A passing fancy, nothing more. However, while he ignored such impulses, there was no way he would let such an opportunity slip away. So he surged forth towards the surprised boar, screaming "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!" and the battle was joined.

 

Kharn: Hp: 5 Dmg: 2

Boar: Hp: 2 Dmg: 1

[Kharn 0]

ID:13913 Battle: 6 Craft: 8 Loot: 16 Mob: 5

Kharn 5/5

Boar 0/2

 

 

With a mighty roar Kharn barely dodged the slashing tusks of the boar and delivered a devastating overhanded blow with Gorechild, his beloved battleaxe. He smote the pig from head to tail, slaying it in but a single blow. With this achieved the boar squealed and then faded, causing Kharn to roar with triumphant glee. "I have done it!" he shouted. "The first of many foes vanquished, the first sacrifice to Khorne complete!" He laughed a joyous laugh, not a creepy or hateful one like you may come to expect from one who took such joy in the vanquishing of another, but a jolly laugh, like one you might hear from a good friend while recounting a humorous tale. Truly though, he was a bit over excited for vanquishing the weakest enemy in the game, but after spending two years cooped up in an inn in an RPG world, wouldn't you be unreasonably happy too?

[Kharn 0]

A screen popped up in Kharn's face. It seemed that he had acquired loot from his most recent kill. "Glorious loot!" exclaimed Kharn. "What battle would be complete without a little looting? And I thought this day could get no better." He seemed to have acquired a good heavy armor chest plate and some pork in the materials section. Truly, this was a most glorious way to go about making a world. Beautiful scenes, fights all around, and loot to be had, Kharn felt right at home in this land. Now If only there had been a way to go through all this without involving that damn menu...

[Kharn 0]

"Oh well" he thought, " a life without hardship is a life without challenges. And an easy life is hardly worth living". So with a broad grin stretching across his face and a new armor piece stashed in his inventory, as he didn't want to ruin his mood by attempting to use the damn thing. Still, he could almost see the nearest town, and it was getting dark, he had better not waste any more time. So with glee in is heart and a jump in his step, he sprinted forwards, intent on reaching the next town and getting a nap, reassured in this world's worth.

[Kharn 0]

As all MMORPG player know though, it is nigh impossible to get through a field without a few random encounters. A short time later once more a boar was encountered by our intrepid and now joyous adventurer, and the Khornate berserker was more than happy to once more clash with the forces of Aincrad. The boar seemed to stare him down for a couple seconds, before letting out a loud bellow and charging the Khorne worshipping axe wielder. Kharn was more than happy to respond in kind.

 

Kharn 5/5

Boar 2/2

[Kharn 0]

ID: 13917 Battle Dice:6 Crafting: 9 Loot: 8 Mob:3

Kharn: 5/5

Boar: 2/2

 

Once more, a measly bore stood no chance against a fully trained berserker of Khorne. With but a single blow he smote the boar, marveling at the motes of light the replaced the area the it once stood. Grinning triumphantly, he stood, waiting to receive the loot that should be rightfully his for defeating his foe. And waited. And waited. And thus Kharn learned a harsh lesson about random drops that all MMORPG player must at some point, that in their randomness, you may get great things, but you may also get nothing. And he wept.

[Kharn 0]

Still moping about the dice gods abandoning him and denying him glorious loot, he arrived in the small village of Innsmouth as the final rays of light left the sky and the world became shrouded in darkness. He walked in and immediately notice it was virtually empty, which is to be expected for a small out of the way village like this in the middle of the night. Nevertheless, it is where he had arrived, and was thus where he would stay. He looked around for a little bit, before fining a small inn on the left side of town. It was small, a bit rundown, and seemed kind of creepy, but it called to him for some reason. So he took a deep breath, and stepped inside.

[Kharn 0]

He stopped and looked around, eyes adjusting to the low levels of light. He saw an NPC manning the desk, and approached him, somewhat weary due to his previous encounters with inns and their devilish locked doors. True, it was mostly the menu's fault, but one can never be too careful. The NPC looked up and said "Hello and welcome to the Lovecraft inn. How may I serve you tonight?'. Kharn just wanted to go to bed, and stated such rather plainly. After claiming his key, he headed up to his room and placed his key on his bedside table, just in case the worst case scenario occurred once more.

[Kharn 0]

He sat back down on the bed with a great sigh, the elderly thing creaking under his immense weight. He looked around and observed that though it was rather run down, it contained all the essentials. There was a table, a bed, a chair, a wardrobe, and a mirror. Kharn honestly had no use for the last item though. Admiring yourself in the mirror was a vanity more reserved for Slaaneshi scum, and Kharn would never stoop to be so low. There was one more small item, one of no consequence to most people but Kharn. It was a pencil. He picked it up and examined it, turning it round and round in his hand. It seemed to be at full durability, and gave him an Idea...

[Kharn 0]

He reached into his inventory and picked out something he had absentmindedly stuffed in there before leaving his former in. It was a notebook, a big one too. It looked like it was meant for sketching. Kharn pulled it up to eye height, and put the pencil next to it. A smile crossed his face, and he lay down on his much to small bed and began writing in this notebook with said pencil,  rather like a teenage girl scribbling in her dairy. "Dear Khorne," he spoke as he transcribed unto the faded paper, "I had the most wonderful day today. At long last I...." Kharn stayed up late into the night, recording the events of the past two years in only the vaguest detail, and then scribing verse after verse about the joy that was today. He recounted he new found freedom, the helpful player, and even added some illustrations of him fighting the boars. At long last when he was finished, he etched the symbol of Khorne on the front and put his name below it in illegible chicken scratch, before tucking it away in his inventory.

[Kharn 0]

Kharn lay back in his bed and gazed out of the window, into the stars. He wondered if Khorne could see him in this game before dismissing such a silly notion; Khorne was a god, of course he could. The intervention of a mere mortal like Kayaba would not be able to block the blood god's sight. As he shifted a bit, he though back to his first taste of Aincrad's challenges, and smiled. Sure, they weren't terribly strong opponents, but they were supposedly the weakest enemies in the game. Just imagine the upper floor enemies, the bosses, by Khorne even the upper players! Two years was plenty of a head start to get strong enough to face him. He was so happy that he was back on the bottom again, as now he could work his way forwards, overcoming adversity and fighting stronger and stronger opponents. What a glorious future it seemed he would face! So, as his senses faded away and the darkness of Morpheus claimed him, all he could feel was the joy of the challenges to come.

[Kharn 0]

As sunlight streamed through the window and birds chirped a greeting to the sun, Kharn's eyes crept ponderously open. He got up and put on his newest armor, after painting it red and properly decorating it with Khornate symbols of course, and headed out the door. He munched on a loaf of bread, and washed it down with some water. Two year old wasn't the best tasting, but he would take what he could get. Besides, as a cultist he had eaten much worse, with his breakfast devoured, he waved a goodbye to the NPC who had hosted him for the night, though he knew it comprehended not what such an act meant, and stepped out the door into the light. It was a brand new day, and he was ready to see what lay in store. His destiny had been delayed long enough.