PP F2: Behind Blue Eyes [COMPLETE]

[Mari 1]

The High Fields of Crossing…That is what Alkor called it, Mari had headed there; not knowing what else to do. What she really wanted…was to drink herself stupid to the point where she would forget, or possibly succumb to the affects of alcohol poisoning. Mari had reached the top of the hill, and a flat grassy plain stood before her. The wind picked up, blowing gently across her face. The grass was lush, green and there were a few boulders dotted around the place. Staring at the sight before her…in silent solitude…Mari fell to her knees, lips trembling as her tears began to fall again.

Mari had yet to wipe the dirt and blood from her face, and her hair was disheveled; clothes torn, but the meticulous girl didn’t care about such trivial matters not now. Not anymore.

She was a murderer; a killer; and she had no one left. Her chest ached, and her heart felt strained with every tortured beat – every beat was just one extra that her daughter, her very own daughter would never have.

Mari tilted her gaze upward to the sky; stars dotted the inky midnight blanket – and the moon, in its crescent splendor emitted a soft yellow light – here – it was so peaceful here.

Mari felt as though she did not deserve such peace.

[Life 0]

Life was walking on his own, preoccupied by his own thoughts. He seemed to have zero cares to give that night, his face only giving away a faint frown. A lot of things had happened over the past week, he was proud of himself for getting Alkor and Mari to work, it made him feel as though this death trap had a meaning. Unlike most people, L's vision of hell was cold and dark, he didn't want to face it himself, loneliness was a silent killer, he knew that all too well. He was just glad that even though he was to never find love himself others could and it would progress into the never ending future. 

 

He stepped out onto the plains of the crossing fields, it was an iconic place on floor two where many people came to relax. The trees blew gently in the wind, their rustle could be heard from any distance even if it was a faint as L's frown. The cold crisp night air sent a shiver down his spine, it was a good feeling for any day and these where his favourite, the hums of the cicadas seemed to agree with him. 

 

L's head wandered to the top of a hill noticing a mysterious silhouette, it was no one he had seen before. He had a feel for telling people apart from their vibes, this person seemed to emit deep pain. He walked closer and his jaw dropped, it was Mari, and she was filthy. "Mari? What are you doing out here?" he still couldn't see her very clearly but he could tell it was her. 

[Mari 1]

Mari tilted her head, ever so slightly toward the sound of another voice, it was Life. Not many players were here; so why of all people did she have to run into Life? One of the few friends she had here, what would he say to her? Seeing her like this? The angry crimson of her name? Mari didn't reply at first, she simply stared with blank eyes - eyes that weren't able to focus on Life, her blank blue orbs seemed to look past him. What...what was she doing?

Mari parted her lips, as if to speak but nothing but a small choking sound came out - as she averted her gaze; held tilting toward the ground. "Nothing." Her voice was lifeless, monotonous. Mari furrowed her eyes, that's right; she was doing....nothing...


 

[Life 0]

When he got a better look at her he wasn't all too sure if it was actually Mari standing in front of him. "Red?" he was deeply confused, was this the same woman he first met? Was this the same woman who sated him from killing Uriel? Maybe she had killed Uriel this time? Either way.. he couldn't believe his eyes. "What have you done?" His eyes widened in disgust, she had actually ended the Life of another human being, nothing but an innocent being. She was exactly right, nothing was what it looked like, but he doubted it was nothing that got her here in the first place. His expressionless face had turned into visible anger, he didn't care for her reasons, she was an abomination to him now. To know what's right and choose to ignore it is the act of a coward, was Mari nothing more than that now? He gripped his blade just in case she decided to try anything, he wasn't going to take a chance with a player killer even if she was his friend. 

[Mari 1]

Mari flinched when Life spoke, closer now -his voice shocked as he said that single, damned colour. Red Mari could feel him standing over her now, she could tell he was at a loss. Life..were you angry? upset? Sad or confused? Or perhaps just disgusted. Life asked what she had done, and Mari couldn't even bring herself to look directly into his eyes. Her entire form slumped.

There wasn't any excuse she could use, nothing she could say to him. There were no words, nor actions which would ever absolve her from her abhorrent behaviour. Uriel had won. He got what he wanted - and that was a broken women. 

"I...." 

Mari's hands whipped up to her mouth as her body shook, she gulped back tears. "I...k-killed....her...just...just...a child"

Finally, Mari rose her head to look up at Life. His lip was curled in disgust - Crimson eyes filled with revulsion. His hand gripped his blade tightly, as Life took on a defensive stance. Would he strike her down here? Kill her just as she had killed her daughter.

"I deserve those eyes." 

[Life 0]

So it wasn't Uriel? If it was anyone he had hoped it would at least be him. "Damned straight you deserve them.." He could tell she was dead inside, it was too late for remorse for her actions, she was a killer and that was something she had to deal with.  When he thought back to what she said he almost gave his brain whiplash, did she say a child? What had she done?! what exactly was going through her mind when she took the life of that child. "Did you.. just say.. a child? You murdered a child? A helpless and innocent being? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" He stormed over to her furiously with an unparalleled and undying rage in his eyes "LOOK AT ME WHEN I TALK TO YOU DAMMIT!" He pulled his hand back and brought it hard across the side of her face, a blow that would normally leave anyone unconscious if he hadn't of weakened it slightly before it hit, the only reason he weakened it was because he still had a soft spot for Mari and he still wanted answers. He was even more pissed at this moment than he was the day he met Uriel.

[Mari 1]

Mari fell forward, the force of the slap sending her hurtling toward the ground. She didn't immedietly get up, she just lay there; dirtied face in the ground. A helpless and innocent child, her child... what was wrong with her...she let her anger control her actions for those few brief moments, clouded by rage - a desire to stop Uriel from hurting her daughter, and now....

"There is nothing for me to say, I'm a monster Life...what right does a monster have to look at someone in their eyes?"

Mari pressed her face further into the ground, "I let my anger get to me. I didn't...I didn't want him to hurt her - he was... he was torturing her."

Mari pushed herself up off the ground, her face had an angry mark where Life had slapped her. Alkor...Alkor told her she wasn't a monster, and that she was merely a human, one that had succumbed to angry, and now she was down a dark - hell ridden path. Mari slowly stood up, body heaving. "Life..."

She met his gaze now, his burning malevolent gaze. "I killed my daughter." 
 

[Life 0]

He was torturing her? "So you put her out of her misery?!" She got up from the ground looking him in the eyes. He could barely hear her words as his heartbeat painfully. Did he hear her right... her own daughter? "You... you didn't..." He didn't want to believe it. His anger didn't allow him to feel sorry for her in the slightest. She was most likely lying to get him to lower his guard "Don't lie to me!" He grabbed onto her shirt and lifted her to his face leaving her dangling by a few inches "I don't believe you!" He gritted his teeth hard, his red eyes burning into her soul. "The Mari i know wouldn't hurt a living thing... where are you witty remarks..? why aren't you insulting me? You're not Mari.. at least not the one that i know" He felt a large burden press upon his shoulders the moment he spoke those words, he would have to believe the words his spoke, he couldn't allow himself to be lost to an imposter of what was once an angelic figure playing her violin over a frozen lake. "Tell me what you've done with her!" It had to be a glitch in the system like the A.I living inside his head which seemed surprisingly quite given the circumstances or perhaps his rage simply blocked her out.

[Mari 1]

Life seemed shocked, he looked at her as though she was some grotesque beast, he picked her up by the cuff of her clothes and she was left feet dangling lifelessly in the air. Mari didn't struggle, she didn't flinch, she knew she deserved his hatred and his bile. He thought she was lying, that she wasn't Mari. In a way...he was right that Mari - that Mari died the moment she impaled her own daughter with her blade.

Mari slowly rose her hands to cup Life's cheeks, her head still downcast, blossom coloured tendrils shielding her crying eyes.

"You're right." She spoke in a dead voice. "That Mari died the moment...the moment I pierced my daughters chest with my blade."

Life shook her, and again, said that she wasn't the Mari he knew, her heart ached - more than what any physical wounds Life would possibly inflict on her now would. Perhaps, if Mari elaborated on what happened, he wouldn't be so cruel and cold with his words...but Mari wasn't in the right frame of mind, to her - she was no better than Uriel. Mari let her hands drop to her sides.

"I was blinded by rage - I wanted to kill him - but he...she...." Mar didn't finish her sentence, her mouth moved but no words came out. Mari was a broken marionette; and with Uriel no longer around to pull the strings she was as useless as a pile of wood.

[Life 0]

He shook his head, what was he doing? If he let his rage continue he would soon do the same as he had done to uriel, if he let his rage go further, he would be no better than her and no better than uriel himself. He had to just accept it, he already hit her once he wouldn't be able to live with doing any permanent damage to her. It was like trying to get an answer out of a dead flower, she was lifeless at this point, there was nothing he could do to her. She was telling the truth, he couldn't believe it himself but it was true. There was nothing but silence as his rage slowly dimmed from his eyes and his muscles relaxed until she slipped from his hands dropping onto the floor. He simply stared over body not sure of what to make of the situation, killers may be scum, but those who abandoned their friends where worse than scum. She simply had been toyed with by uriel, baited into his web, trapped and played like a fine game of chess, he assumed uriel was also dead at this point. His own voice was broken, wanting to scream but only showing concern for this broken woman "What am i going to do with you?" He crouched down and placed his hand gently on her cheek, he had hit a woman, he was a disgrace himself. He starred at the marking on her cheek and the rest of her unkempt appearance, she was an utter mess. 

[Mari 1]

Mari dropped to the floor as she slipped through his fingers, Mari fell to her knees; arms bracing her fall. Her fingers dug into the cool moist earth as Life asked what he was going to do with her. He knealt down and Mari braced herself for another harsh slap across her face. When she was met with a soft caress her head shot up, broken blue eyes questioning his actions. Mari gritted her teeth- arms shooting out to grab him by his collar.

She shook him, shaken voice screaming. "I KiLlEd my DaUGHtER!" She screamed at him. "I TrIEd to KiLl URIEL, and He used HER!" Mari had snapped, everything that once seemed numb was all coming back to her in waves of maddening sorrow. "He UsEd her as a SHIELD! If I....If I...." Mari let go and had started punching his chest - her hits barely landing on him - shaking fists unable to do much of anything. 

"If I hadn't....If I hadn't lost it....I...She...." Mari shook her head, voice raising again, "WHY aren't you Looking at me with Hate filled eyes. WHY?" 

Mari burried her face in her hands, "Alkor.....I dragged him down with me...WHY?"

[Life 0]

He flinched at her words, her hate for herself was immense. She had dragged Alkor down with her too? He must have followed in his own footsteps before Mari had calmed him, it made sense to him now, but it still hurt. Mari.. Mari... how could she be such a hypocrite.. "I should have killed uriel when i had the chance.. i knew this would happen" He sighed, at least the parasite was dead now. He could feel her pain, it was horrifying to him. Alkor was another story, he didn't have anything to do with her. His palm trailed down her neck and then back over to her forehead brushing her hair to the side, she had been through too much to continue hating herself. "Don't hate yourself.. hate this world" She could take the path of redemption and get her name cleared, the colour was no big deal. He looked into her eyes seeing through them into her soul and tried to smile as warmly as he could to comfort her "It's not your fault.." He wasn't sure how he was going to convince her that when he couldn't convince himself, deep down he knew there was no one responsible for your actions but yourself. However he did understand that everyone had their limit and uriel had pushed her over her own. L himself had a short threshold, it didn't take much to piss him off but he had great self control though ever since that day he had slowly began to lose it. He couldn't complain though, the voice in is head didn't want no part in Maris death, maybe she liked other killers.. accepting her as her own child of madness.

[Mari 1]

Mari bit her lip, eyes furrowed when Life said he should have killed Uriel. "N-no..."  Mari knew she was a hypocrite, so she couldn't beg Life not to extinguish the existence of another. How could she preach such words when she herself was such a low monster. Mari felt herself fall deeper into her own self hatred. "You hate me don't you?" She asked, turning her head away from him as he brushed her hair out of her face. It was a shame, Mari couldn't exactly go and clean herself up at an inn anymore. She gave Life a wry grin. "Least I look the part of a beast." Her voice was drained, no longer full of the raw emotion it was moments before - it was as though she had again, flipped and was now hollow.

Life tried to tell her it wasn't her fault, Mari shook her head - grabbing his hand, coaxing his fingers to brush up against the blood that stained her face, Mari was finally able to give him the full story, void of any emotion. "If I hadn't let him get to me. I would not have snapped. Seeing him kick her, twist her tiny form in his hands - I saw red - I didn't realize what I had done till it was too late. He had used her as a human shield. I played right into his game. Alkor came, because I asked him to if I hadn't replied in  a dedicated time frame...why Alkor...."

Mari glanced away. Alkor...she had wished she never messaged him in the first place - why was it that she had messaged him in the first place. Life, the boy who sat before her - she and he were constantly playing games with each other. Getting on the others nerves; poking fun and insults at the other. Would that ever continue now? Just what would Life do with this new information? 

"He brutally murdured Uriel. Without remorse. He was, a precise machine, and seeing that...I feel...." Mari fell silent at that. Unable to continue.
 

[Life 0]

He nodded slowly at her words, it processed but it was almost like it went in one ear and out the other. The past was now in the past, he wouldn't abandon Mari now in her time of need. He held the edge of his sleeve and got out one of his water bottle wetting it and began to clean the blood and dirt off her cheeks "Such a beautiful woman should only bare a smile. I don't hate you Mari, not one bit. You didn't choose for any of this to happen, and you definitely didn't want it to either" He started to wish he had brought some food with him, he didn't really care much for it, he was fine with bread and water but he felt as though she needed some comfort foods to help her which he couldn't provide. "I guess i can't take you back into town now can i?" He tried to laugh but all that came out was a tired breath. He shook his sleeve and rewet it making sure she would be clean enough as to not look like a savage. "I won't abandon you Amari" He half smiled for a second and got up extending his hand out to her, it seems as though there was more to their friendship than just smart remarks and insults.

[Mari 1]

Mari sat there silently as Life tried to wipe the blood away from her face. Life continued to try and console her but Mari was tired, she didn't have the strength to put up a fight nor an argument. She shook her head when he mentioned town. "I want hard liqour." She said dryly as she tilted her head to the side, allowing Life to clean the other side of her face.

 

Life got up and extended his hand to her, Mari grabbed it, she seemed dead and unresponsive, that was until he used her real name. Mari's hand clasped tightly over Life's and it was as though she snapped, images of Uriel flashed through her mind. His scathing grin, his maniacal laughter...her daughter...her daughter limp and lifeless in his hands.

Mari tugged down hard on his Life's so he fell to his knees. "how DARE you use that name!" She hissed, cerulean eyes wild - angry. "HOW DARE YOU!"  She was shaking with rage, how dare he! How dare he use that name!  Mari shook, as she stomped the ground, new tears threatening to  burst from the corner of her wild eyes. "That person is dead! dead!"    Mari gripped her face, giving  a faint laugh as she backed away, "You...ahah...ahah...you said it yourself...I'm not her...I'm not HER anymore!"

[Life 0]

He dropped to his knees without even a moments notice, Mari bursting out again into pain. I must have triggered something by saying her real name.. he though to himself. She was going insane and he felt the voice begin to talk to him in his head again Yes.. just like that pet, rip her open from the inside, she will soon go insane his voice rumbled in his throat at her remark Shut it bitch I'm not in the mood for your mind games. He got back up slowly and walked towards Mari as she stepped away, it was just as she said, she was going insane. "No Amari, you're still the same person, i was wrong to say that to you. The past is in the past now, it's ok to move on" He wasn't all to sure what he meant himself but it sounded alright to him, he was just trying to get her to accept reality, nothing wrong with that.. right? 

[Mari 1]

He said it again...he used that name...that tainted, vile, horrendous name. Amari...

Amari...the name of the woman who killed her daughter.

Amari...the name of the woman who dragged Alkor into her own mess, because of her own selfish fears and desires.

Amari...

Amari...the demon, Amari the monster.


Mari shook her head violently, backing away from Life. "D-Don't. DOn't call me that!!" She tried to sound vigilant, threatening but her voice broke, and trembled, why was he saying this now? Why was he talking to her like that? "P..please..." Mari whimpered, eyes widening in fear - Mari felt afraid, afraid of herself, afraid of Life - afraid of what she had become and who she had left behind. Right now, she wasn't able to keep a coherent thought or emotion, she was struggling to focus on the one thing. She was a mess.

Mari had been so calm and collected around Alkor so now why did she feel like she was being broken down now?

[Life 0]

It's seemed as though L's perception was working to the opposite of how he had intended it to. Though he was jut trying to help her he couldn't help but continue pressing on, almost as if he was persecuting her his red eyes burning with judgment, ready to consume her soul, but why? This isn't what he had intended. fuufuu~ She's a mess my darling, you're doing a beautiful job continue to decimate her until she's even more broken then she was the day she killed her daughter.. such a majestic sight... Im getting excited thinking about it~ She seemed to moan in pleasure as he watched Mari tremble begging him to stop. Don't talk to me she devil he snapped back at her "What am i doing wrong.. what's so bad about calling you by your real name? This is who you are" His voice became deeper as he finished the sentence, what the **** was wrong with him?

[Mari 1]

Mari took another step back from life, then another - with each step forward he took she took a step back until the back of her heel hit a rock and she lost her balance. Falling forward. "P...please Life...stop..." His eyes, his burning crimson eyes, that intense gaze - Mari couldn't quite pick the emotion behind them, but it hurt...it was difficult to describe but his gaze, it felt like it was literally burning her. "L..Life..." She begged. "It's not... I'm not....Alkor said....I'm....I'm not a monster....I can't..." her voice cracked as she pushed herself up off the floor. "Please..?" 

[Life 0]

She continued to beg and plead with him. He didn't understand.. what was he doing wrong? Nothing she said was registering to him, why couldn't she just accept the person she was? She was only human, deep down everyone was the same, it wasn't her fault. The voice didn't disagree with him, and it worried him, just how far had he lost himself? "No, you're right Mari. You're not a monster, you're a human just like the rest of us. We all make mistakes, and deep down.. we are all the same" It happened again, just exactly what was going on with him, it was almost like he was killing Mari from the inside out... just like the voice told him to.. what have you done with me... fuufuu? i haven't done anything my dear, you're simply being your true self, the one i fell in love with~ He was scaring himself now, what exactly did he hope to accomplish from all this? He definitely wasn't helping Mari at all and it didn't look like he could ever help her again.