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[F6-PP] Acceptance for Brokenness. <Domarus & Mina>


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Domarus sat in front of the pool and waterfall of floor six.  Specifically he sat on a carved stone meant for meditating in front of it.  People didn't usually come here unless they were trying to complete the quest itself.  That was actually Domarus' original plan when he came here.  To try and see if he could take the 'Calming the Soul' quest again.  Not for rewards, but for the actual hands on experience...  There was much he had to work on.  However the system didn't seem to be in his favor.  And thus, he figured he may as well take the time to try and find some peace while he could.  Before he got to work.  He had placed a photo of his mother he gained from the quest 'What We Fight For' in front of him.  If he lost focus, or became unsettled at all, he'd just look at the picture and relax.  It was difficult for him to get to a state where his mind quieted.  He still hadn't mastered it.  However he was hoping that one day.  He could learn to quiet the raging voices in that stormed through his mind.  Unfortunately, today would not be that day.  Even his practice would be interrupted very soon...

@tricolor_mina

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Mina hopped along the small ridges of rock that were nearby, glancing at the roaring waterfall that poured from the natural rock formation around the pool of water. she smiled faintly, thinking of a few of her favorite activities IRL; Hiking and Rock-climbing. both of them were her favorite thing to do during her vacation aside from playing the violin and practicing theater or dance. she closed her eyes briefly, letting out a deep breath, before jumping towards the pool of water, allowing herself to fall into the deep water, and plunge down whilst curled into a ball. A few moments passed before she surfaced, letting out a gasp of exhilaration. she had landed closer to the shore of the pool of water, so she swam towards the edge, and pulled herself out of the water. Mina opened up her inventory, and equipped Midnight soul, pulling up the small white scarf that came with the cloak, hiding most of her face once it was fully wrapped around her neck. she turned around, prepared to continue her trek, when she saw a familiar red haired player seated on one of the flat rocks that were nearby. her eyes widened slightly, before she darted back into the jungle, and lept into a tree, climbing the branches until she was mostly hidden from view.

-Enters Stealth-

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 ID# 111342 results:

 LD: 17 (Stealth rating = 17)

mina's appearance (hair is still pink owo)

@Domarus

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Edited by tricolor_mina
XD I pinged the wrong person on accident
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Domarus sat there on the stone as he tried to focus his mind.  He started by thinking about his mother.  After seeing her photo long enough, he was able to memorize it, and so he could picture her clearly in his mind.  Her eyes, her hair.  The gentle smile.  Just seeing her soothed his muscles.  From there his mind moved to the makeshift memories he had invented.  Memories of him and his mother.  Meeting one day and talking.  Of spending time in a cafe.  Getting to know her better.  This was all made up, but it made him feel like he had a real friend for once.  However, this thought led to others.  He thought of Hestia, but he couldn't consider her a friend yet.  She was trying to help him reach a better place, but whether they were friends or not...  And then.  If word got out about who he was and what he did.  Then more than likely she'd be his ally, and all of Aincrad his enemy.  Including player killers.  This thought led him back to a moment he didn't want to recall.  Christmas day.  While everyone else celebrated, he had broken down for a third time.  Crushed under the realization of how alone he truly was.  And that it was his fault in the first place.  Before his mind could dive down any further however, he heard a splash from the pool and his eyes opened immediately.  He snatched the photo of his mother instantly to keep it protected, but the splash occurred further in.  He sighed and put it back in before he saw someone climb out and give him a quick look.  Pink hair was the first thing he saw...  And then the black outfit.  It didn't look like a functional piece of equipment whatsoever, so he assumed it was for style...  But he didn't see the point in that either.  As soon as she saw him however she dashed into the forest.

Domarus sighed.  Of course.  He wondered if word got out about him already.
    
"Whoever you are, you don't need to run or hide.  Especially if you're intention is to kill me."  He spoke in a normal tone.  No hint of emotion.  No threat, no anger, no fear.  Just..  Telling them that there was no reason to run off and hide.

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(OOC: mina drops her stealth)

Mina allowed herself to be viewed slightly by Domarus, her eyes filled with resignment. She didn't necessarily hate him, but she certainly didn't like him. for some reason he rubbed her the wrong way, though as of recently the man had actually earned her respect, namely during the Miraak boss fight. It made here shudder when she thought back to it, especially since she could still easily remember the claws of the priest rip into her chest, and cause her body to shatter. It ended up being a numbing experience, and had caused her to rethink how she wanted to live. To re-evaluate everything that she had ever done. It had even made her realize that she truly didn't want to die, despite knowing she had no place in the world if this game was cleared. She felt a jolt run through her at the resigned tone of Domarus' voice, his voice lacked the power and confidence that usually played behind his words, which startled her quite a bit. "Naa... your voice lacks its usual tone..?" she murmured to herself, before jumping from the tree to the ground, and pulling down her hood, turning to face him as she did so. "You seem like you're different than before... you certainly don't remind me of the confident man that led us in the Event Boss a few months back..." Mina's eyes had locked onto Domarus' own eyes, and her own held stern confidence.

@Domarus

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There was a moment where nothing happened.  No movement, no sound.  Soon however, he heard movement in the trees before the figure walked out in the open.  She pulled her hood back to reveal..  Mina?  That made sense actually, now that he thought about the hair.  She held a stern face, eyes filled with confidence as she looked into his own.  In his own eyes however, she'd find nothing but a heavy weight.  Burden.  And just raw weariness.
    
"Much has happened since the event.  Given the fact that you don't hold any hatred in your eyes right now, I'm guessing that she hasn't told anyone yet,"  he said.  The very last sentence spoken in a lower volume than he originally did.  He glanced at the pool of water.
    
"Also, this pool is meant for meditation.  I've been trying....  And failing, to find some peace here..  Just another method that's failed thus far unfortunately."  Domarus said nothing, but he did shift around so he could view her easier.  As he did so, Rhozarth shifted from his position and glared at the both of them from it's perch.  Domarus sent the familiar a glare right back, showing that he and his dragon were not on good terms right now.

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Mina shook her head, and let out a sigh. "... there really isn't much that one could actually do to lower my opinion of themselves once I've begun to respect them. Speaking as a former cop, I've seen some of the crap that people do for stupid reasons, or for reasons that they believe are the right ones. All it is, is just disappointing." she said gruffly, her eyes displaying her annoyance of his worry.. until she noticed his face had the faintest trace of worry, or had she completely imagined it..? brushing that thought aside, she let out a sigh when he mentioned he was meditating in order to find some peace. "... Ya know... I always thought that meditation was just a load of BS, something that some random idiot came up with to try and calm people down. All it really does is give your brain the opportunity to process information. If you're in a rough place, all you're gonna end up doing is just causing yourself to dwell on dark thoughts, those what-ifs and could've-beens... At least, that's what it does to me." she glanced upwards at the sky, her eyes darkening slightly as she did so. "I'm not sure what kind of situation you might be in, but I'm fairly certain that you can pull yourself out of whatever kind of depressive state you're in right now. it might not work immediately, but I have faith that you can do it." she noticed the glare that the dragon was giving her, and she briefly gave a two-fingered salute to the dragon, a glare of her own present on her face.

@Domarus

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He chuckled sadly at her words and shook her head.
    
"If you were a former cop, you'd probably arrest my a** when you heard what I've planned and done.  And hate me to my core all the same."  Despite his chuckle, there would be a sign of fear and concern.  Hoping he was in fact completely wrong about what he had just said.  And that by some sheer miracle she could find it in her to not only forgive him but...  No.  He was not about to give himself a hope too high for a monster like him to get.  She spoke again, stating how in her opinion and experience, meditation was bs.  She talked in detail about how it did the opposite for herself.  What's worse, his own experience amplified her words.  He sighed.
    
"Thank you, for those beautiful words of encouragement and support."  he muttered.  When she told him that she was sure he could get out of whatever depressive state he was in he only sighed, picked up the photo of his mother, and inserted it in his inventory too quickly for her to see.
    
"No offense Mina.  But you're making empty assumptions with no information of who I am, what my past is, and what has happened in the past month."

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Mina shrugged when Domarus said that she would probably end up arresting him if she knew what he did. "While that may be true, I'd probably end up having to arrest myself for what I did in the real world, so you're not the only person in that boat. I'm pretty damn sure that half of the green players have darker, dirtier secrets involving crap they've done that they keep under lock and key, even more so than the damn red and orange players." '...Myself being one of them' she thought sadly, taking a closer look at his face. It was obvious he was worried about her opinion of him, so she decided to nip that in the bud straight away with a blunt answer. "Well to be honest, I didn't exactly have a good opinion of you until recently during the fight against that priest. I respect you, and the fact that you tried your best to protect everyone. Especially since most of those people were probably kids, or still fairly y- Aaagh! I'm getting off topic! My point is, is that it'll take more than whatever you did to make me hate you. All you'd end up doing is disappoint me, and even that wouldn't change my opinion. I'd just tell you try your best to redeem yourself." mina let out a snort of laughter when he made a comment about what she'd said. "Thank you very much sir, I'll be here all week!" she said snarkily, her voice filled with humor. her eyes on the other hand were dull, and rather lifeless compared to how most people's eyes were. she shrugged off his last comment, figuring her eyes made her message all the more clear. "Everyone has to dance with their demons at some point, Its a part of life, isn't it?" she said quietly, meeting his eyes. "The only thing I see going for you is the fact that you don't have the 'eyes of the dead' that tend to accompany those who are stuck in that kind of state, ne?"

@Domarus

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He fell silent as she spoke.  Stating how he could only disappoint her, not infuriate her.  How he impressed her and earned her respect after the event with Miraak.  She didn't understand.  How could she?  He began to have an inner struggle, which would show on his face.  He couldn't take this.  She was so wrong about him that he had to tell him...  But the fear of what she would think, say or do was immense.  He fought between the two with cons and pros.  He couldn't just let himself be fearful forever.  He had to find out one way or another whether people would accept him.  People other than Hestia.  He needed to see if he just got lucky with her, or if everyone gave him the right to be redeemed.  To be forgiven.  Or if he would be hated by the majority.  The danger here, was that if she reacted badly....  And especially if she told the public.  Then that would be it for him.  He'd be subject to their hatred, thier vengeance.  But he couldn't live a life of fear..  Fear was something he'd never felt before now.  And he hated the feeling.  He looked her in the eyes.  Serious now.
    
"You'll only know how wrong your words are, if I tell you everything I've done Mina.  And I can't run from this anymore.  It will be found out eventually."

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mina shook her head vehemently, an angry look plastered on her face. "You say I'm wrong, but I know I can't be! There's no way in hell that I can hate someone else more than... than..." she had started off shouting, but her voice ended up trailing off until it was little more than a whisper, making it so that she could only just be heard. she felt fear of her own crush into her, but she shook her head to clear her mind. It was obvious that Domarus was conflicted about how she would react to what he said, so she had to bury that feeling inside of herself. she met his gaze, her eyes still lacking their light, but filled with a grim determination. She stood up straighter, and snapped her arms out wide, her cloak billowing out, and her scarf unraveling, and returning to where it once laid on her shoulders. "I refuse to believe that. I firmly, truly, Honestly, refuse to believe that." she said, her determination showing even more. "My words aren't wrong, and I know they are not, Domarus!" a faint shadow crossed over the upper part of her face after she finished, shadowing her eyes just barely. If he looked at her face, he would see unshed tears welling up in her eyes. her next words were little more than a quiet whisper, just barely loud enough to hear. "... 'cause how the hell am I going to hate someone more than I hate myself, how am I to fear them?"

@Domarus

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Domarus said nothing at first.  He had managed to catch what she finished with however.  He scoffed at that.  She hated herself?  Please, he thought.  He looked at her.  Took a deep breath.  And then...
    
"In the real world I practiced the art of manipulation and deception since a young age.  After perfecting it I went to public school for the first time and managed to rally multiple people to not only befriend me, but to serve me.  And I used them to destroy the bullies who ran the school.  Not beat.  Not drive off.  But send them to the hospital for a month destroyed them.  The teachers did nothing because I had their favor.  Over time I had gained influence among business men.  Both honest and shady.  Eventually I gained dangerous allies, and gained control of their leader.  I manipulated someone who was close to discovering my true personality into a situation where he couldn't take it anymore and committed suicide.  All of this while I held a charade, fooling everyone into thinking I was their shining knight.  I even built an immunity to alcohol so I could fool others into sharing vital information by getting them drunk.

"Intro SAO.  I forged a potion that forces someone to enter a depressive state and remember their worst memory, so that I could manipulate a woman named Mossino into becoming one of my four generals.  I also used a potion that forced the pain receptors to shut off.  And tortured him in ways that would kill ordinary people, but not in a video game.  After finding out an organization kidnapped players, I set it up so that Aereth would be kidnapped to show him a lesson.  When Hidden and I rescued him we discovered they turned those children into assassins.  I had them slaughter all but three of them, keeping my hands clean.  I found Hestia's sister by accident and turned her from an innocent and protected young girl into my own apprentice of darkness.  I lied and tricked everyone in this world specifically to earn their favor and rise to the top.  I protected players in the event because I had to build up my reputation.  All of this because I sought world domination.  To control and dominate over everyone, and everything.  That's what my username was made from.  Domarus, is an altered form of Domination, Mina.  I've killed mercilessly by using my words and other people I've manipulated into becoming my slaves.  I've fooled everyone into thinking I'm a hero.  I've forced people to change into a worse version of themselves.  So tell me:  Do you still hate yourself, more than you hate a man like me?"

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Mina stood there throughout his speech, listening to the pain behind the last few parts. listening to the utter regret that seemed to lace some of his words. At first, all she could feel was the promised disappointment, which she expected, but then she picked up the faintest trace of... loneliness..? Mina slumped visibly, and hung her head, her eyes wide with dawning realization. 'He doesn't want to be left alone..! how did I not... how could I not?!' she thought back to her stay in the hospital after the murder... and to how her old friends had completely and utterly rejected her. How they had abandoned her. It was something that, in all honesty, she really couldn't blame them for. She had done so much good in her former line of work, but nobody cares once you do just one wrong thing. She plead guilty, she plead guiltyEven though she didn't like what Domarus had done, she couldn't... no, she wouldn't hate him. 'If I did that, I'd be no better than the people that left me behind and left me with the mental scars.' she shuddered visibly, and pressed one of her hands over her scar. "... I... have no reason to really... hate you... Even after hearing that." she shuddered again, before her legs gave out underneath her, and allowed her to fall to the ground.

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Domarus watched as she seemed to have an inner war of her own.  She didn't speak or react for a while.  To the point where Domarus quietly gulped, his throat and chest tightening in worry and anticipation.  He was hoping she could find it in herself to forgive him, and accept him for who he was trying to become.  Eventually, after seeing her shudder, she spoke.  She told him that she had no reason at all to hate him.  Domarus didn't notice her shudder again.  His head dropped downward, and his shoulders fell.  Almost as if a literal weight had fallen off of him.  And this was in fact very true.  When it at least came to Mina, he didn't have to be afraid.  There was hope after all.  He had a chance for redemption..  He sat there breathing heavily for a moment before he looked up.  Something just clicked in his mind, and it was reinforced when he saw her on the ground.  He spotted Rhozarth glaring at her, his wings opening up.  Domarus' eyes widened as he knew what he was about to do.  The player launched himself forward, not at all trying to be subtle.  He leaped forward and took the brunt of Rhozarth's attack.  The familiar had leaped towards Mina from a high branch, bursting into flames and ended up clawing into Domarus instead of Mina.  Domarus grabbed his familiar by it's tail and smashed it against a tree, creating a gash in it.  The dragon hovered in the air after Domarus let him go and glared at the player before returning to the trees.  Domarus panted some more before speaking.
    
"While I..  Appreciate, your words..  I have to ask..  Do you say that because you choose to forgive me?  Or do you say that out of guilt?"

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Mina barely heard Domarus speak to her, her mind had begun pounding with the old thoughts and fears that she had once. Her worst nightmare was being completely and utterly abandoned, left all alone. Because in this world, she no longer believed that she could stand being alone. If it ever happened again, she was certain that it would kill her, or leave her broken beyond repair. If one paid close attention, you could just barely make out the faintest trace of sobbing coming from the pinkette. She thought back to the Miraak fight, to how she was mostly ignored, even by her own teammates. How in the Christmas event, she had been mostly abandoned except by the strange white haired girl. She remained hunched over, her hands curled into tight fists, and pressed hard on the ground. Her voice came out as a weak whisper. "... My reason...? For forgiving... you..? Because I know what rejection... is like... It hurts." She felt her mind get assaulted with more memories that she had of those days before everything went wrong. A smiling little girl holding a degree next to an older, blonde girl and a red haired man, both of whom had smiles on their faces. A woman playing the violin In front of a large crowd, her face displaying her emotions for all to see, and sweat dripping down her face. A dark metal gun clasped between her fingers as she pulled the trigger. 'It always feels so wrong!!' She though, her face filled with tears. 'Why?! WHY!?!?? What did anyone do to deserve something like this?!' Mina let out a sound that could be likened to the sound of a wounded animal, before continuing her earlier statement. "... I can't hurt someone like that! WHAT GOOD DOES HATING SOMEONE LIKE THAT DO?!?!!"

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He didn't move.  He didn't turn to look at her.  Not for a while at least.  He turned to look at her.  Dealing with something herself obviously.  But the question is....  When did it happen?  He sighed as he walked over to her.  He hesitated as he stood by her side, but crouched down and sat beside her.  He said nothing for a while.  After all, he didn't know what he should be saying right now.  Which still terrified him.  Not knowing what to say.  He had been hoping she would offer him forgiveness out of a good heart.  One he was hoping more than anything would prove that there were in fact more people, with pure and honest hearts.  That he was wrong.  It was a hope, something he hated in the past.  But now it was the only thing keeping him afloat. 
   
"I shared my sins.  My guilt.  Even if I did paraphrase.  What is it that burdens you?  What guilt do you hold onto?"

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mina stared down at her hands, the look on her face slowly being replaced with solemn regret for her actions. She shuddered again, and closed her eyes, a solitary tear running down her cheek. "I might not have done anything that was too terribly close to what you did, but it was still rather bad regardless." she said calmly. "I led a fairly normal life when I was a kid. I was a poster child, got good grades and everything. I even graduated early." she looked up, her face filled  "... what I did could've been called an accident had it happened another way, for the first at least." she said softly, clenching her hands into fists as she spoke. "But each and every one of those things caused more than one life life to end, no matter what I could have done, no matter my intentions. When I was nineteen, my friend and I were in a two-way collision that caused a fatal car crash. My wimpy little motorcycle versus a truck, and a Ferrari versus a semi-trailer. It was a miracle I even lived, even more so that I was injured as little as I had been, though the injuries were still major. The driver of the semi Flattened the Ferrari. All of the people in the Ferrari were killed on impact. Prior to that, as I failed to pay any attention, I ended up slamming into a truck head on, and while they were okay, my friend and I were not." Mina lifted her head and one of her hands, and tapped her left eye, before removing the eye-patch covering it, and revealing a large scar that covered most of the upper part of her face. She had a wistful smile on her face. "To spare you from the Gorey details, I lost an eye, and got a concussion, while my friend was comatose with a fractured skull for a month. Of course, my eye still works here, and I'm grateful for that, but... If I had paid more attention that day, I don't think that those people would have died. When I was twenty-three, I was involved in a fatal shootout between a pair of Yakuza, and a few civilians. I... shot and killed one of the Civilians, and, though my memory of this is quite hazy due to blood-loss, I recall killing one of the Yakuza as well. I was sentenced to jail for 2 years for it." Mina fell silent after she finished, and hung her head. "They all turned on me, all of my relatives, and all of my friends. I lost my job entirely for that, and I was forced to go to mental rehab for several months, and I've never been able to let go of my past. Good intentions or not, I... I still shot and killed innocents. I almost killed myself and my friend by being reckless." mina curled up a bit, her head buried between her legs, and she pulled up her hood. she shuddered, and clasped her hands over her head

@Domarus

Edited by tricolor_mina
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Domarus listened but said nothing.  He sat there for a good while without a word.  Then, his and tightened into a fist, twitching once or twice.  They tightened more as he took a long, deep breath, and exhaled to calm himself down.
    
"Mina...  You, are a true moron."  He turned to look into her eyes, his own full of anger and disappointment.  "You think what you had done was horrible?  Was that bad?  You injured one person.  You gave one person a quick death.  Both of these times it was an accident, regardless of how others feel about it.  And you think that's bad?"  He turned his body to her as he stood up.  His balled fist shaking, with regret and pain mixing in with the anger and disappointment.  "I beat people down both physically, emotionally and spiritually.  I manipulated and twisted people into a darker version of themselves.  I killed people on purpose. Thinking only of my own goal of world domination.  You made two accidents that you never intended to make."  He shoved his finger into her right shoulder, not enough to knock her down but enough to make an impact.  "If ANYONE has the right for redemption.  To try again.  To escape this world of depravity, guilt and pain it's you.  So instead of sitting there sulking about it."  He stopped talking and looked away gritting his teeth as his eyes watered.  He was not in a position to lecture her.  He was in the same boat really.  Still...  He walked over to a tree, placed his arm against it and leaned on it.  "I'm not strong..  Not like I make myself seem.  I've done things I can never take back Mina.  I wouldn't be surprised if I was arrested for life in the real world, and even executed when I confess my crimes...  But if possible I want to achieve redemption."  He turned to her, the anger remaining, but dwarfed by fear and pain.  "If you cannot reach a place of peace how can I?!  Who will be there to show that there is such a thing as redemption?!  Or will I find out that I was right?  That redemption, salvation, purity, all of it an illusion?"

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mina allowed him to yell at her, to berate her for her stupidity at "Moping" over the past. She knew moping was kind of stupid in her case, she knew it very well. but, sometimes... she just found the pain too much to bear. She had given an abridged version of her past, albeit it was more than what she usually spoke about. normally, she wouldn't even mention that much unless prompted by close family, or by.... . her thoughts trailed off as she watched him, he was ranting about how bad the pain was, and how she could still seek redemption in the eyes of others. 'I'll never redeem myself in my eyes as long as I'll live.' she thought, her eyes filled with sadness. Sometimes the pain of her actions still  ached badly, and sometimes it was minimal and she was perfectly fine. Mina watched Domarus as he broke down, asking her how could he ever find peace if she could not do so herself. Mina looked down, and let out a tired sigh, before she simply walked forward, and slapped him. her blow didn't even seem to damage him, though the shock from any kind of hit was enough to bring someone into reality again if they were lost in their emotions. She gave him a stern look, though her eyes had a softened light to them. "You have to look at what you did, and see if you could ever make amends with those that you have wronged." she said calmly. "However, you aren't helping yourself by allowing the grief to control you, and allowing your mistakes to define who you are. Let me say this, You can't recover if you can't admit what you did was wrong. In that regard, you're doing a much better job than the people that I've had locked up, because at least you know what the hell you did, and you're admitting to wrongdoing." she grasped him by the shoulders, and looked him dead in the eyes. "But, you said that you want to recover from your pain..? I'll let you in on a little secret that my therapist told me. Actions like that, the pain never goes away. there will be days where the pain is seemingly gone, and you're just filled with a warm, happy feeling... and there are days where the pain is so bad that you'll just curl up in a ball, and feel the worst you've ever even felt. It doesn't go away, but you can manage the pain enough to live a normal life." she gestured at herself. "Me? I'm already at peace with what I've done. I mean, sure, it ruined my life, but I was able to move past it after a while. You just gotta find the strength to move past it yourself. you can't let yourself be dragged down this early on in your recovery stage. It's gonna hurt dammit, but the value of the solace that this will bring you is priceless."

@Domarus

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Domarus heard her approach and turned to look at her.  His instincts screamed to defend himself but he forced himself to stay still, allowing the slap to happen, though it didn't even move him much.  When he prepared for something, he could become a mountain side.  Her first words pulled a quick laugh from him as he looked into the sky hopelessly.  
     "Make amends?  To the families of those I've killed?  To the families of the people whom I've manipulated, twisted, and turned into brainwashed servants willing to slaughter at my behest?  Make amends to all the lives I've ruined?  That's a good one Mina."  She continued anyway, stating how the first step was admitting he was wrong.  That he was doing very well in that regard, or at least compared to prisoners she'd locked up.  She told him that the pain never goes away, but that it's manageable enough to lead a normal life.
     
"I don't even know what a normal life is, let alone how to live one..."  Then she said something that caught his attention.  She told him she made peace with what she did.  Domarus' eyes snapped towards her own, a hint of hostility in them.  However it vanished as soon as it came, as he tried calming down.  
     
"You say you've made peace?  You didn't seem to have made peace with anything save for that you were guilty Mina.  Your words and your eyes do not align.  I'm a master of deception, don't think you can hide it from me."  He wasn't sure if that title was a good thing, or not anymore.  Despite him trying to turn a new leaf, there were still good uses for deception..  Right?  
     
"And besides.  I never had a normal life.  I don't think I could ever live one."

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Mina balked at the response she received. It was a bit disconcerting to be sure, but there was nothing she could do if he genuinely didn't believe in himself. She gritted her teeth, before grabbing the front of his jacket, irritation present on her face. "Naa..! Just what the hell do you want to accomplish then?!" She snarled, her eyes flashing. "You can't get any better if you chose to believe you can't! You have to be better than that, or you'll be stuck like this!!" she shoved him backwards, and took several steps backward, breathing heavily as she did so. Crap like this always made her feel angry, but in this case, the anger was broken by a deep sadness. It was obvious to her that he didn't believe he could get better, but that he desperately wanted to seek redemption. It made her... She supposed she couldn't describe the emotion she was feeling anymore. It hurt more than anything. When he mentioned that he didn't believe that she had made peace with her actions, she shrugged."Believe that all day long, but at the end of the day at least I can sleep knowing that I've at least tried to make amends with those that I've hurt." she said softly. "But I suppose that stems from the mindless will that I have to live. Otherwise, I might have just hurled myself off of the edge of Aincrad." He made a comment about never being able to lead a normal life. "One doesn't need to lead a normal life to be able to make amends with another person. Just don't let the guilt of your previous actions take hold of you."

@Domarus

Edited by tricolor_mina
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