[PP-F2] Uneasy Hearts Weigh The Most. (Endilix)

[Flints 0]

**Continuation of "Fleeing in The Dark" **

Flints gave a sheepish smile to Raz and waved goodbye as the exited the cave. She stepped lightly even though the weight of her world was bared on her shoulders. Flints tried her best to ignore this and gave her attention to the setting sun painted the sky in brilliant colours of pinks and oranges. The world around them paled in comparison to the day's final song; it's ending just as beautiful as its beginning. Flints was silent as she lead Endilix off of the path to the city and begin skirting along the woods that ebbed against the mountainous range that was floor 2.  She didn't live in the city, but this was a way she took to get there, they still had quite a ways to go before they even got close to home. Flints' eyes occasionally met Endilix's before she finally spoke. "You didn't have to walk me home..I come home alone a lot. I'm strong enough to protect myself..." She muttered. She wondered if Endilix's was treating her like a child for some odd reason. She wasn't sure. She guessed that maybe her facade wasn't as great as she thought it was and he figured out that something was bothering her. 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix walked alongside Flints in perfect silence besides the birds in the trees and the wind rustling through the leaves around them, until she finally spoke. Endilix had wanted to talk to her, but he also didn't want to push her to do so. If his company had been enough, then that would be enough. When she talked about being strong enough to go home, and how Endilix didn't have to do these things, Endilix turned to her and smiled. "I know you can kill any monster that comes your way between here and there. You dispatched those bats very easily, and even with style. To the point that I'm even a bit jealous," Endilix said with a light chuckle, before continuing. "But you can't always get rid of the monsters in here," Endilix pointed at his head, "and in here..." Endilix pointed to the scar on Flint's chest, indicating her heart. "You don't have to explain anything to me. I just wanted to make sure the demons inside of you didn't eat you. The demons out here... I could care less about, and I know you feel the same."

Edited April 16, 2016 by Endilix

[Flints 0]

Flints gave no waning to her words, In a way she tried to use them to push Endilix away. She didn't want him to come along. The more he followed the tighter she closed. She just wanted to go home and check on Tristan. Maybe get a nap in before her long night began. Her long night of stroking Tristan and holding him tightly as he acted as if everything was fine. This was the good part. The part she loved. But his nights, when he finally relaxed enough to fall into slumber were plagued with him tensing and reliving things she couldn't even imagine. And she was helpless. But at least he slept. Endilix talked about how he assumed something was on her mind but she began to close up more and want nothing to do with this conversation until finally she blurted out. "Zelruus is dead." Whether or not Endilix knew about Tristan's relationship to him was another thing. "Zelrus and Tristan were an unstoppable duo. Problem is, no one thought another player would swoop in during a boss fight to kill him. No one thought he would die before everyone's eyes..." Flints felt her body tense up. "I didn't know at first. But I thought it was weird that one day my inventory was packed with things I had never seen, Demonics I couldn't even dream of." Flints chuckled. "I sent some messages over to Tristan out of curiosity. But I didn't get a reply. It was odd. We are in constant contact. I didn't get an answer as to why we were holding more than just a few more potions and food items than usual. We were holding a legacy." She felt her teeth clench as she tried to find the words to say. "But the worst part was the answer I got. Him coming home and holding a beautiful cloak, with more sadness in his eyes than I've ever seen before...the sole purpose of a tank defeated by silly loopholes. But yet. Some how I know he feels like it's all his fault.. " Flints stopped weaving in and out of the tree line and decided to walk through the forest, hiding away from the path and the shops they passed. 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix followed Flints, listening to her words, but wholly unprepared for them. First, was the mention of a player's death. That immediately put a lump in Endilix's throat. The idea of anyone's death would do that, even if Endilix had no idea who they were. Though Endilix had an idea, at the very least. News was released of the Frontlines and their roster occasionally, and so Endilix knew the names, even if he didn't know the people. Endilix knew that death on the Frontlines may be inevitable at times, but seeing it so close to home... that was always a different story. Endilix continued to follow Flints, listening to each word, no matter his own personal feelings, his entire aloof nature seeming to have evaporated in an instant, replaced by a hardness in Endilix's heart.

Finally, when Flints had finished, Endilix grabbed her hand, not wanting to lose her entirely as she sped up through the forest in her frenzied emotions. He tried his best to keep pace, but he had no idea what to say, if anything should even be said. Finally, Endilix managed, "Was he a good man? This Zelrius?"

[Flints 0]

Flints felt Endilix's hand catch hers as she stopped walking. She looked to him and starred at their hands for a while. "I didn't know him too well. But I saw him at key points of my life. I saw him when I first started to get to know Tristan, he paraded around with me like I was a shiny knew thing and I loved every second of it. I met Zelrius for the first time when I ended up in a swamp. This large water Wyvren was ready to shower us in great sparks of lightly but Zel killed it instantly. The best didn't have time to finish its roar." Flints gulped at the sight that played out in her mind and before her very eyes. "He gave me a look of disdain. Like Tristan did this often and I was nothing more than the newest of items getting in the way of their friendships and dynamic duo routine. That first meeting was brief. The second time I met him in the desert. He was surprised I was still around. He had two woman with him that he couldn't give a care in the world for, so it seemed. They bickered and fought amongst eachother but he kept his cool. He treated things so nonchalantly. Everyone assumes he's an egotistical hedonistic golden boy. He puts on this big act. But really...he felt more emotions that anyone of us could have ever imagined. I often wanted to get closer. To ask him what plagued him. But the world around us moved fast and the more I noticed Tristan not hanging out with zelrius. The more I noticed Zelrius accepting the fate of being alone. For a while before we married I feared Zelrius wanted to kill me. To keep his friend close and to keep himself from being alone. It's tough being so powerful. People fear you more than they respect you. They hate you more than they know you." Flints went through her inventory and showed Endilix her claws. "He gave me this sword for my wedding gift and I later was able to use my first boss item on it to make it more than a prize above our bed. He also planned my wedding. He made it the biggest and most lavish of any wedding Aincrad had ever had. Just because it was his "family" He congratulated me on scooping up his bestfriend and stealing him from him. But most of all. Out of everyone I met. He meant everything he said. Even if he said so little. Your armor was given to me by him as well." She gave a small grin as she looked to Endilix. "He never considered himself more than a boy who needed a challange. But to me he was always a man who could save Aincrad. A man who maybe pretended to be stuck in his own mind and wanted people to view him badly... I'll never know...but who could really be all that bad if they were trying their hardest to push the frontlines to their fullest." 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix stopped when Flints did, and looked into her eyes as she spoke. She spoke highly of this man, as if he was a hero. The type of hero that Endilix had always wanted to be. Endilix placed his hand on his chest, when she mentioned that the armor he wore had been given to her by this man. Zelrius evidently had his hands in many parts of Aincrad, far reaching or close to home. He was a man who had evidently meant more to Flints than even Zelrius had known. "Well, in his honor I'll continue to wear this armor with pride. Did he have a symbol, or something to identify him? I'll get it painted on the armor, in his memory."

Endilix sighed, there were a lot of questions he wanted to ask Flints about this news, such as why, or how, but Endilix supposed none of that mattered at the moment, and to those who it did matter, he was certain it was being handled. But the important question was, "Are you going to be okay? It's not that I don't care about anyone else in your life, but I don't know them. But you are a part of my life, and I need to know that you'll be okay, because you can't be okay for others if you can't even be okay for yourself." Endilix placed his hand on her arm, staring into her eyes, "Promise me that you'll be okay."

[Flints 0]

Flints looked down and began to grin. "A golden Phoenix for the golden boy.." She looked back up to Endilix and sighed "it's not me that's in pain. Sure I thought about the man more than i probably should have. I wanted him to accept me. Because I was dating his bestfriend. But j never stopped being myself so I guess there's that. What I'm worried about is the 6'2 man that's in my home curled up on the bed waiting for me to get home. Waiting for me to help him sleep or maybe even worrying that I'm out and about." Flints ran her fingers through her own hair in a nervous act but looked back into Endilix's eyes. "I don't want to watch the one I love wither away. Who knows maybe he will heal In a few months or a year. But I know his role, and Zelrius' roll was very important. Having them both it of the frontlines is going to be costly. Then there was another he shared inventory with as well that passed. But I didn't know him...so I can't say much on the matter.." 

Flints thought hard on Endilix's question. Did she really have an answer? Was she going to be okay? She needed to be strong. To carry the weight for her husband when he couldn't. Just like he had done for her. "I'll be okay. But just in case...maybe you should stay over or something. Be my guest? Keep him safe from the night..." Her voice became a whine. "I would like to sleep..." 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix nodded to Flints' answer about the symbolism of the man she called, "The Golden Boy". Endilix smiled at the idea of a golden phoenix on his armor, and found it fitting. "A phoenix always rises from the ashes. Zelrius may be gone, but his legacy will live on forever, if he's the hero you say he is." Endilix thought about the other person who died, and wondered if that man was a hero as well, but that isn't something that Flints would be able to answer. For now, being able to carry the legacy of someone close to Flints was good enough for Endilix.

He could see the anguish in Flints' eyes, and he could see that she couldn't promise him what he needed to know most. In response to her question, Endilix gave a nod. "I'd be honored to stay the night as a guest. It'd give me peace of mind anyway." Endilix squeezed her arm lightly and gave her a smile, "I already told you once, I'll never leave your side again if you don't want me to."

[Flints 0]

Flints listened to Endilix and gave a sigh. At least she wouldn't have to have him worrying about her. She had never really seen this side of Endilix. It was refreshing. Flints wondered how Tristan would feel with Flints brining him home. it couldn't be that bad. As they got closer to the city flints gulped and began to go through her inventory and message her husband that she was near by and if he wanted anything from the town. She walked into the city and looked to Endilix. "Do you want to get food or anything like that? I usually pick something up I'm not sure what to get..." She tried to take her mind off of Zelrius. She had a job to do now, and she was going to make sure it got done. but at the same time she was pretty excited to have a guest in her home. She had never had to entertain for a Guest. Would she even have to do that? With the given situation she felt as though walking him around their townhome style shop and then curling up in bed was enough. She gave a smile when he squeezed her arm. "I've never had a guest in my home.." 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix chuckled as Flints seemed to be uncertain of how to handle a guest. "Food sounds nice, I'd be fine eating anything, though I could go for a good steak." Endilix gave Flints a wink, hopeful that the mention of her favorite food would cheer her up a bit, as he continued, "Imagine how it was for me my first time I had a guest. Here I was, this girl, half dead from being beaten to a bloody pulp by my twin brother after practically flirting with her in a random little NPC shop." Endilix smiled to her, "There she was, asleep on my couch, recovering from the night, and while I made her breakfast, she just suddenly woke up tearing up her shirt." Endilix started to laugh, "I doubt she remembers it, but I gave her a shirt that day, and for the longest time she never wanted to take it off." Endilix got a bit red, thinking of the breakfast they had shared after the first time he had ever seen her beautiful bronze skin in more than just fleeting glances. That was the first time Endilix had ever had any sentimental value in an item, especially an item as simple as a shirt.

Endilix shook his head, and tried his best to swallow his emotions as he looked to Flints, "In any case, having a stately knight for a guest can't be any worse than that wild woman. So steak?"

[Flints 0]

Flints walked through the markets and shops still skirting back and forth in attempt to find something to make for Endilix. Well, maybe something already made. Should she buy drinks? Well she still had some fancy drinks left over from her wedding. "No. No kita that's old. Wait, it's fake it can't get old..." Flints was broken out of her stupor when Endilix started to tell a story, at first she was intrigued by how much he seemed to put Into it. How much he seemed to care. Then she realized the woman he was talking about was her. That all these memories they shared had meant more to him than she had know. She began to blush and drop things before bumping into Endilix's chest and looking up at him "I..uh...okay..steak it is..I have some great quality steak at home and some drinks as well.." She was a little lost by everything he said and slowly lead him out of the shop in silence. All the way to her home right outside of the city. She stopped Infront of the door and looked up at the cottage style shop. It's warm, quaint atmosphere radiated from its door all the way up to its second floor. "Wild women never forget..." Flints smiled and quickly unlocked the door and pushed it open, Antillan waiting as it opened. Flints giggled and noded for Endilix to enter. She followed and called out into the open "I'm home darling~" she didn't expect an answer as she went through her HUD and unequipped her armor and everything with it. She was left with just a faded blue shirt and black tights. Starter clothing. She felt herself blush and didn't expect Endilix to remember the shirt he gave up. She waved to the couch that was pressed against the side of the stairway and the small table that was near the shop counter that had two chairs tucked neatly into it. "Welcome to our home! It's little but it's just us three so it's really homey." She smiled and turned on the fireplace and set out some plates, humming happily. 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix gave a sigh, as he walked behind Flints to the place she now called home. The man hadn't wanted to admit this existed, but here it was, and here he was, in Flints' new home. Endilix looked around the small place, before focusing his eyes on Flints, and the clothes she wore under her armor. The simple faded blue shirt. Endilix blinked as it sank in, realizing that it was the same shirt he had been describing only moments before. "Wild women never forget..." Endilix said in a melancholy tone as he watched her move about the place, setting up plates for their dinner. Endilix looked at his HUD and unequipped his own armor, hammer, and shield, leaving him with just a simple brown tunic and a pair of black pants.

Endilix couldn't really bring himself to speak further after his realization that after all this time, after her marriage, after all of that, she still wore the shirt he had given her. Endilix had always said he had never stopped loving her, but it was her way of showing that at least a part of her had never stopped loving him. Finally, giving a hard swallow to the lump of emotions rising in his throat again Endilix managed, "It's... it's lovely. Not quite as cozy as my bar, in my opinion, but I suppose it does what a home should do." Endilix gave Flints a wink and a smile, before looking away and looking around, trying not to let Flints see the emotion in his face.

[Flints 0]

Flints sat at the couch and looked up to Endilix who seemed to not really give her much in response other than he preferred his bar. She grabbed his hands and pulled him to the couch after she had finished fluttering about. She sat and looked up at him. "What's wrong Endilix..?" She could feel the air around them changing. And him changing. He was pulling back and although he flashed her the smile that won her over a year ago she knew something was on his mind. Her big green eyes settled on his as she smiled up at him. "Yeah...it is a home. It's just got the bedroom upstairs but this is all of it.." She felt herself suddenly become tired. But she keep smiling and hoped things would be okay. "So did you want to eat now, and talk later. Or keep talking? I'm fine with either, I have to admit though, I'm really worried about you now." 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix let Flints lead him to the couch, though he tried his best to avoid looking at her, seeming to find anything else more interesting than the woman in front of him. This was his affirmation. This was him being forced to realize what he tried so hard to ignore.

"It'd probably be best if we ate. I'll talk if you want." Endilix sat back on the couch, still not wanting to meet Flints' eyes. He had wanted to believe that things could be different. That the first woman he had ever loved would turn out to be the last. But here she was, never to return to how things were. Endilix stood back up again, uneasy. "If you want me to, I'll stay up to make sure that everything is okay. I've gone plenty of sleepless nights grinding out in the field since you left. Training my mind to cope with this game. With loss and what it's like being alone, being even without Emerath." Endilix stared at the floor, the hard lump in his throat refused to leave. Here he was being selfish again. Just like he had all the times before.

"I apologize. Acting like this isn't very knightly. Or very much like me." Endilix turned to Flints, his normal smile returning, "I'll be okay. I always am. That's what being a hero is all about. Smiling in even the worst of times, for anyone who needs it."

[Flints 0]

Flints felt her heart drop as Endilix seemed to become aloof she nodded and was going to get back up to get food and drink for them but she couldn't shake the terrible feeling that overcame her. This was he backlash of her running off and getting married. She had left Endilix on his own. A man who loved her just as much as Tristan did. She met him first and promised him the world, only to be swayed and fell yet again for someone else. She was a monster. She didn't regret anything but the pain she left Endilix in. Alas he pretended he was okay again as he stood and told her that he would keep watch. She wasn't to sure now that she was home how it would work. Would she make him go upstairs and rest with her there? To sit and watch her curl up and take care of the sleeping man there? To watch her try her hardest to keep him asleep by humming and stroking him. No...that was too much. To much for anyone to ever handle. This was a mistake. She shouldn't have placed her duties on Endilix. She stretched out and grabbed him around the wait, hugging him to her as she nuzzled his abdomen. "I'm sorry...I'm a horrible person who dragged you out here. You don't deserve this...no one does..you don't have to have this knightly facade for me..normal Endilix works just fine.." Flints rose to her feet and set out two normalcy steaks for Endilix and snowfall cake. Then placed he small cask of eternal ale in the center of the table. The food glistened just as beautifully as it should have. Steam lifted off the steak and filled the house with the wonderful aroma. She suddenly realized she hadn't eaten in days. But she decided to only feed Endilix.  

[Endilix 0]

Endilix wasn't sure what normal Endilix was anymore. He had changed so much since he had started this game. Was normal Endilix even still around? Had he died when he had fallen in love, and forsaken the aloof, carefree man who would do nothing but sleep with women and not give a care in the world about what the next day brought? The only Endilix left was the White Knight. The only Endilix left was the hero that he needed to be, and the man that everyone else needed him to be. The Endilix that Flints knew had left the day she did, the day she never returned.

Endilix hadn't responded to her words, and had just watched as Flints placed the food on the table. Was he really hungry now? He saw her only place the food on one end of the table, despite it being a meal for the both of them. Endilix shook his head. "I won't eat then. You need to eat, and get your energy up." Endilix stared at the table, then at Flints, but he still couldn't bring himself to meet her eyes. Endilix was gone. All that was left was the White Knight. The only reason Endilix had stayed was in hopes that Flints would come back someday.

Endilix closed his eyes and took a deep breath, before wordlessly turning and walking out the door. He didn't go anywhere except right out the doorway. He had promised to keep watch, and so he would. Endilix would be the knight he promised to be. That was all he had left now.

[Flints 0]

Flints stared at the table and then back at Endilix who was now...leaving. He was leaving her? Her eyes teared up and she felt her heart ache. She reached out but he didn't turn around. She felt her breath catch in her chest but it was too late. He was outside and the door was closed. She looked at the food before her and felt ill. She looked back at the door and could hear Endilix outside, but a sudden ringing in her ears left her shaking her head. It was too much. She had made a mistake in letting him walk her home. And an even bigger one in asking him to stay... She was killing the man slowly and in the most painful way. Flints smacked the plates and ale off the table where it hit the stairs side and burst into pixels above the couch. She felt herself close up and run. She ran upstairs and into the open room that was lined with shelves and a big bed at its center. Curled up in the silk sheets was Tristan. Already asleep. She felt tears start to run down her face as she plopped into the bed and cried quietly to herself, nuzzling against the mans chest then hiding against his neck. "I love you...please tell me I'm not an idiot. Please tell me my choices won't kill my friends...please tell me it won't kill you. I'm dangerous...to everyone...even you.." She closed her eyes tightly and took a small ragged breath before forcing herself into a deep slumber. Maybe she would sleep forever to escape the world. Just like her husband had. Maybe this was best. She was no help to the world around her. This is where she belonged. This was how she would keep everyone safe. 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix stood watching the quiet night of the 2nd Floor outside. He had been expecting for Flints to come out and talk to him, but the door behind him did not move. Endilix supposed that was for the better. He needed time to cool down and be with his thoughts. Who he was and who he needed to be, and who he had become. Endilix had gone from an aloof, carefree individual, and turned into a stoic knight. He had always had that part of him inside of him, he just had never really had a reason to partake in it. A reason to fight, and a reason to put aside his carefree nature. But then he had met Flints. He had found that reason to fight, but it had turned out to be fleeting. Why did he still fight? For the same reason he had begun. Now Endilix just had to be a hero for everyone. Endilix vowed to stand strong when everything was crumbling around him, here and now.

Over the course of the night, Endilix kept his eyes on the horizon. He knew that nothing would happen, but he promised to do a duty. After a bit, he went inside to the small home, and picked up the food, before bringing it back outside. It had gotten cold, but Endilix didn't mind. It was still better than anything else he had eaten in the past few weeks. He put it down and took the plates back inside, before returning to his post. He folded his arms behind his back, and simply waited for morning, as was his duty for the evening.

[Flints 0]

Flints stirred carefully, the warmth of her and Tristan tangled together becoming too much she scooted away from him and stroked his face, lightly tracing the scars on his smooth alabaster skin. Despite forcing herself into sleeping here she was, up again in the middle of the night. She gave a sigh and uncovered herself, ignoring the tights she had thrown on the floor and pulled her shirt down more, it's length making it an acceptable tunic dress. It was late anyways and she doubted anyone would see her anyways. She rubbed her eyes that felt heavy from the crying she had done, heavy and tired. Her cheeks still get stained, she wondered why this game felt too real. And how all her emotions were "too real". She fluttered down the steps silently, quickly putting her hair up so just her bangs framed her face, the long, deep brown strands fanned down her back and almost to her waist as it swished back and forth.

Flints' eyes scanned the living/ dinning room and noticed the plate she had tossed about the house was now fixed and settled back on the table, empty. She gave a sigh and put it in the cabinet. Her mind kept wondering to if Endilix had actually left or not. Her eyes settled on the door of her little home, no shadows moved outside of it but she couldn't help but hope he was there. Flints slowly approached the door and, thanks to it being suited for Tristan she couldn't see outside the windows in the door without giving herself away. So she carefully opened it, pulling the door in towards herself and peaking out, then walking out. Giving a little gasp to the cool air that touch her warm, honey beige skin. It was hard for her eyes to settle on anything in the dark, but once they adjusted yelped at the sight of the stoic knight Infront of her. She wrapped her arms around his waist and nuzzled his back, still lost in her sleepy state. "You didn't have to stand outside all night and stare at the horizon for the sun. You can go home if you wish. The thing I needed protection from was myself...I got some sleep. So thank you. If you'd like you can come inside and sleep. Or I'll stay up and talk to you. I don't think I'll be going back to sleep anytime soon." Flints was thankful she was behind Endilix. She didn't expect him to stay all night. If she would have known the goofy man would have taken everything so seriously she would have been a better guest. And kept her pants on. 

[Endilix 0]

Endilix had been lost in his thoughts as he stood, watching the world slowly pass in front of him. He had been so lost that he hadn't actually heard the door open behind him, and as Flints grabbed him around the waist, he instinctively reached for his hammer that wasn't hanging from his belt, forgetting that he only had his tunic and pants on. He sighed, before relaxing as Flints warm, sleepy voice made its way to his ears.

"Unfortunately, I can't protect you from yourself, but I can still watch, and wait, to make sure that any other demons meet a terrible fate." Endilix turned his head to look at the woman, but he couldn't see more than a leg and some hair from her being behind him. "No monsters came, thankfully. It would have been a long fight until you came to tear them apart. Goodness knows I wouldn't do enough damage." Endilix chuckled, "Also, the steak was good. Even though it was cold, and had been thrown off the table."

Finally Endilix looked back out to the horizon, "I'm not tired, to be honest. My brain won't rest. A part of me just wants to get back out there and adventure some more. Go back to being a hero. I have no place in this home or any other."