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[PP - F1] Are You Going to Run? [Alyce][COMPLETE]


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He loomed more intently and it caused an emotion that caused his eyes to dilate. It looked similar to him when he was a kid. It could have just been him thinking it because he heard the words "bad memory" and "monster" associated with it. "Tell me. Did it look like a child to you?"

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He still thought it looked like him, but it obviously resembled something very traumatic for her. He set aside his fear and do comforted her. "Don't worry. It will pass. It only takes one small breeze to morph a cloud into something else." He felt his heart pick up pace as he kept staring at it as he remembered all the faces of the people he had harmed. He wasn't the kind to give into fear though, especially when there was a girl, in fear, relying on him. "If it is that bad, focus on me, focus on the grass and friendly wolves around you, focus on now. The past is in the past. A nightmare is only that, a nightmare. It doesn't have to be reality." Who was he kidding. As he looked at the cloud, he could feel his fear of the past strangling his heart, but he knew she wouldn't see what he saw. It was only because he remembered how he was at those times that he saw himself.

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Ryuu still had his protective arm around her. "Yes, what is it?" He tried immensely hard to slow his heart rate and maintain level breathing. He thought she would easily be able to feel his heart beat and feel scared that even he, the one who seemed unafraid of everything, was scared, scared of himself.

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His eyes dilated again. He had been discovered. No, maybe he could... No, nothing he could come up with would sound believable, but he still had to lie. "No. It's nothing." He shuddered at the lie. 'Why must you betray me, my own body. We are supposed to be comforting her, not the other way around.' His caused his body to tense up a bit, so it would be harder to feel his heartbeat. "I'm fine. What is it Alice? What is causing you to be like this?"

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"That's horrible. If he were to do that to me, he would probably end up in..." Ryuu's voice trailed off. He couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence. It would be like admitting to himself that he was a monster that would harm anyone or anything with out a second thought. 'She's acting strong for me. I'm so weak. On the inside, I'm nothing but pathetic. I'm so pathetic that a terrified girl has to comfort me.' He knew that she could tell he was frightened, but he couldn't t bring himself to tell her that.

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That comment stung. He understood what she had meant, but her didn't like it. Still though, he had no other choice. He released the built up tension in his body, allowing her to feel his terrified heartbeat again. "Yes, I don't know how to put this though. I'll try my best. When you stare at that cloud, you see that doll, right? Well, when I look at it, it looks more human, but in a way it isn't human. It looks like me, like how I looked back then. The me that hurt everyone who came into contact with me. It's one thing being stuck in a closet with something you think is a monster. It's another thing entirely being stuck in a body with something you know is a monster." He let out a shaky breathe. "I can still feel its presence inside me. Even though I've made it submit to me, I can still feel it trying to claw its way to the surface."

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She smiled and tilted her head to the side "let go of the past Ryuu. There are some things you must keep from the past, and some things you must abandon. Those were fear clouds. It shows the player what they fear. I read it in a book." She stood up and put her hand out to him "Ryuu..."

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Ryuu looked tentatively at the extended hand before he took it and stood up. "The only problem with that is some things refuse to remain in the past. You may never know the mental stress this monster puts on me, but I would never wish for you to know of that kind of pain and fear. And thank you for listening. It may not have fixed any problems, but it does feel a bit better." He looked into her eyes again. This time they felt comforting, like someone was trying to understand him. It was new for him to see that in someone's eyes. Usually he only saw fear or hatred.

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Ryuu was still surprised how touchy she was. He finally hugged her back. He smiled back. 'This isn't a pity hug. She wouldn't smile like that if it were. I've got to say though, she is kind of cute like this.' She was so close that Ryuu could feel her heartbeat as well as her body heat. 'They really went all out when making this game realistic.'

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"Nah. It's me too. I've only met a few others that I could relate to and you're one of them." Ryuu didn't,t know when he should let go, since he hadn't had a hug in so long. 'Do I wait until she lets go or am I suppose to let go first? I can't remember.' Ryuu assumed that Alice was enjoying it, so he'd just let her decide.

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